Post by Sedition: Gladiator on Feb 26, 2011 22:30:04 GMT -6
20 years ago I stumbled on something that altered my childhood. I was 7 years old (now I feel old). My first stepfather, who would likely resemble a character from Trailer Park Boys, just less funny and more creepy, and his fat beer bellied deadbeat family brought a VHS tape to our house. What could this tape be. Home videos... please no. Clint Eastwood westerns, ok they are cool to watch now, but when I was 7 they were sooo boring. No, it was the recorded version of Wrestlemania 7. It seems a member of stepdad #1's deadbeat family had a sattelite dish and recorded it. As shocked as I was that someone in his family could actually afford a satellite dish, I decided to give them the benefit of the doubt and gave it a watch.
I had never actually seen any wrestling before. I had seen Hulk Hogan in Rocky 3, then I saw the Hulk Hogan cartoon and wondered why he didn't call himself Thunderlips anymore, and heard kids at school talking about Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior. That was my exposure to wrestling. As they first started watching, I retreated to the basement to escape the smell of beer, cigarettes, and doritos. I listened from the basement as people cheered. I needed to know what all the cheering was about. I had missed the first 3 matches and came upstairs to see the promos leading up to the tag team title match. I watched as The Hart Foundation lost their title to the Nasty Boys. It was the very first match I had ever seen. I enjoyed it, but I wasn't hooked. A few matches later I saw the match that would get me hooked. I watched as a flamboyant man in a crown walked named Macho King walked out with a possible hermaphodite named Queen Sherri. I was rather confused by these two, I then saw a maniacal, running steroid called The Ultimate Warrior run out and shake the ropes. They said he hailed from Parts Unknown, I was something of a geography buff and was quite familiar with the cities of Canada and the United States, and I had never heard of Parts Unknown. I figured it must have been somewhere in Saskatchewan. I watched the entirety of this 20 minute match, and I was hooked.
From that moment on I was a wrestling fanatic. I rented all the Wrestlemania`s and all the other Pay Per Views. I realized pretty quickly that Wrestlemania was all about the spectacle. Sure you could usually expect 1 or 2 great matches, but usually if you wanted to see a overall great wrestling show you should watch Summerslam. But still I would wait with anticipation every year for Wrestlemania. My passion for wrestling lasted through my entire childhood, but fizzled out by the time I turned 18. Had I grown up. Was this a Wonder Years style coming of age moment. Is that Turn Turn Turn I hear playing... nope. It`s the sound of Vince McMahon buying WCW. Sure it was fun for a while to see these dream matches, but the fun went away. Suddenly Vince McMahon was without competition and the product became dull. I still watched casually, but the last PPV I ever paid for was Wrestlemania 18. Watching WWE without any competition was like continuing to play Monopoly after wiping out your competitors. Sure you`ll get some action when you land on Chance, but everything else is just to safe. Needless to say Wrestlemania is not as exciting for me as it used to be.
In this edition I will be discussing the Road To this years Wrestlemania. This is the time where wrestling is always supposed to feel special. This is the time where viewers who may have lost interest come back to the fold. This is where every match should feel special. Sadly, with 5 weeks left, I am underwhelmed with the build up. The Elimination Chamber PPV was great. Solid matches boosted this PPV and made it one of the best WWE has had in a long time. Unfortunately, it was also the most predictable PPV in recent memory. There was no doubt surrounding the outcome of any match. Anyone who knew anything about wrestling would have been able to call the winner of every single match on the card. This has led to an unremarkable potential Wrestlemania 27 card. There are some highlights, but many more lowlights. This potential Wrestlemania has me begging for something to draw my interest.
The Miz vs. John Cena
I have spoken some about my disappointment with the build up of The Miz. It`s 5 weeks till Wrestlemania and he still feels like a second rate champion destined to be forgotten. So one would think WWE would do something remarkable to boost his stock leading up to Wrestlemania right... wrong. Their best idea to boost The Miz was to give him a clean win over Jerry Lawler, because you know how impressive it is for a 30 year old World Champion at the top of his game, beating a 61 year old, out of shape semi retired broadcaster is. To top things off, WWE has added The Rock as the guest host of Wrestlemania to add some star power. They are involving him in the Cena vs. Miz rivalry, clearly leading to the inevitable moment where The Rock raises Cena`s hand in victory and passes the torch. The Miz has now been made to feel like a supporting player in the main event, and he`s the defending champion. And seriously do we really need to see another Wrestlemania WWE title match with John Cena in it. He has been in the WWE Title 6 times prior to this. This will be his 7th consecutive Wrestlemania WWE Title Match. If he wins this one that will mean he has won the WWE title match at 6 of the last 7 Wrestlemania`s. Not even Hogan was used this much. Give someone else some time in the sun already.
Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio
This seems like an unremarkable match. Del Rio is awesome. He will be more than able to carry the work load in the ring, and on the mic. Edge, not so much. As a face he is lame on the mic, and he hasn`t been the same in the ring since his last injury. Though this match does offer something, and that is the potential of seeing Del Rio crowned World Heavyweight Champion. Though I remain skeptical about this. I would not be shocked if they keep the belt on Edge to keep the fans happy, and put it on Del Rio at the next PPV. Here`s hoping that this isn`t the case. I also am interested to see what Christian`s role will be in this rivalry. Having him come out and attack Del Rio when Del Rio had Edge in the Armbar at Elimination Chamber makes me wonder. Was that just a setup to Christian working against Del Rio after Mania, are they planning on making it a triple threat, or will they have Christian in Edge`s corner and turn on him to help Del Rio win. I would be happy with any of the three as it would give Christian a near main event program to work on. Then again they could just do what they`ve always done with Christian and decide to go nowhere with the storyline. Only time will tell.
The Undertaker vs. Triple H
This match seems to be getting a lot of buzz. I am marginally excited about this match. It is a good star power match. It continues on the Undertaker streak saga, and the Undertaker Shawn Michaels saga. I only have 2 problems, first can these two put on a good show. They are both fresh off of injuries. It is safe to assume that neither one will be putting in a heavy match load leading up to Mania. Will they be up to putting on a 5 star match. My other problem is, what ever happened to the new talent initiative. WWE had built in storylines between HHH and Sheamus, and Undertaker and Wade Barrett. These were the guys who put them out of action in the storyline. I know these matches wouldn`t have been as big of a draw, but it seems to me that Barret and Sheamus are getting left out in the cold on this one. That being said, this match is one of the more interesting one`s this year.
CM Punk vs. Randy Orton
I don`t have a whole lot to say about this one. Mostly because it is a pretty pointless rivalry. It seems too much like they just stuck these two together because they had nothing better to do with either of them. CM Punk is at the top of his game right now. I don`t think he has ever been this over. Orton... not so much. He was riding high, but has fizzled out lately. I think this will be a pretty good match, but I am still looking for a reason to care.
Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan
They seem to be setting this one up. Another what else do we do with these guys match. The U.S. Title felt like a big deal not too long ago. Now it seems like a joke. Mostly because the very talented Daniel Bryan has been reduced to dopey comedy with Gail Kim, and the Bella Twins. Sheamus is a 2 time WWE Champion, but lately has seemed like someone from NXT. These are two guys who 6 months back seemed like they were headed somewhere, and now the seem to be lost in the shuffle. Sheamus isn`t great in the ring, but he does show good agression, and Bryan can probably carry anyone to a great match... but again, who cares.
Wade Barrett vs. The Big Show
This one makes me angrier than any other potential match. Barrett is so much better than this. The Big Show is so lousy in the ring he makes Sid Vicious look like Ricky freaking Steamboat. In fact, from now on I will be referring to him as The Big Slow. Wade Barrett spent half of 2010 as the premiere heel in the WWE. There was no one more menacing, no one more commanding, and no one who got more mic time. Barrett was hot. This rivalry has killed his heat and made him feel like just another Smackdown guy. Plus they have done nothing to make Barrett look strong against The Big Slow. They have made Ezekiel Jackson look freakishly strong against The Big Slow by having him bodyslam, and suplex him without breaking a sweat. I hope they aren`t leading up to a handicap match where Barret and Zeke go against Big Slow. My only hope for this match is for them to involve Diesel. At the Royal Rumble they seemed to single out some moments between Barret and Diesel, and had Barrett eliminate him. As Diesel was leaving he exchanged a brief stare down with Big Slow. Though a tag match with these guys still screams bore, it would be cool to see Diesel in the match and would be a good novelty match.
Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole
This is the best thing going right now. Cole has been annoying as a broadcaster, but Lawler has stepped up and got the fans solidly behind him. I don't know if there is a WWE fan in the world who is not anxious to see Lawler beat the stuffing out of Cole. Will it be a match or will Lawler have to go through A-Ri to get a shot at Cole, I don`t know. All I know is that a potential match between a commentator and a semi retired 61 year old is the most well developed storyline on this card. How sad is that.
Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes
Let me sum up my feelings about this match in one word... BORING. So Mysterio is good in the ring, but lately he has been lazy. Every match he has has the same spots, and they have all gotten old. Rhodes is adequate, but unexciting. I just could not care less about this one, unless The Big Slow was involved. In the words of Forrest Gump, That`s all I have to say about that.
I personally am curious about what else there will be to come. there`s still several guys with no current story that deserve to be at Mania.
John Morrison - Is there anything I really need to say about this one. The guy is amazing. He was the scene stealer with his Spider Man moves at Royal Rumble and Elimination Chamber. Give this guy a reward.
Ted Dibease - His constant losing storyline and on the fringe relationship with Maryse has got to be leading somewhere. He is a solid performer and is getting better and better.
Kane - I have always thought Kane sucked, but he did have his best year ever out of his 13 plus lackluster years. He worked hard this year and deserves a Wrestlemania moment.
Drew McIntyre - Silly Kelly Kelly story aside. McIntyre has stepped it up lately. His performance at Elimination Chamber was great. He showed great charisma and intensity that he hadn't shown in the past.
Jack Swagger - In the past year Swagger has gone from MITB winner, to World Heavyweight Champion, to meaningless mid carder, to IC title contender back to meaningless mid carder. Though I believe he was pushed beyond his capacity as World Heavyweight Champion he deserves better than what he has now.
Dolph Ziggler - WWE owes him big for making him look like a chump and giving him the shortest title reign since Yokozuna won and lost the title at WM 9.
I do not know everything the future holds for this Wrestlemania. I do not even know if the matches I listed will all happen. What I do know is there is no way I will be wasting my money ordering this one. Maybe it will get better, but I doubt it.
I had never actually seen any wrestling before. I had seen Hulk Hogan in Rocky 3, then I saw the Hulk Hogan cartoon and wondered why he didn't call himself Thunderlips anymore, and heard kids at school talking about Hogan and the Ultimate Warrior. That was my exposure to wrestling. As they first started watching, I retreated to the basement to escape the smell of beer, cigarettes, and doritos. I listened from the basement as people cheered. I needed to know what all the cheering was about. I had missed the first 3 matches and came upstairs to see the promos leading up to the tag team title match. I watched as The Hart Foundation lost their title to the Nasty Boys. It was the very first match I had ever seen. I enjoyed it, but I wasn't hooked. A few matches later I saw the match that would get me hooked. I watched as a flamboyant man in a crown walked named Macho King walked out with a possible hermaphodite named Queen Sherri. I was rather confused by these two, I then saw a maniacal, running steroid called The Ultimate Warrior run out and shake the ropes. They said he hailed from Parts Unknown, I was something of a geography buff and was quite familiar with the cities of Canada and the United States, and I had never heard of Parts Unknown. I figured it must have been somewhere in Saskatchewan. I watched the entirety of this 20 minute match, and I was hooked.
From that moment on I was a wrestling fanatic. I rented all the Wrestlemania`s and all the other Pay Per Views. I realized pretty quickly that Wrestlemania was all about the spectacle. Sure you could usually expect 1 or 2 great matches, but usually if you wanted to see a overall great wrestling show you should watch Summerslam. But still I would wait with anticipation every year for Wrestlemania. My passion for wrestling lasted through my entire childhood, but fizzled out by the time I turned 18. Had I grown up. Was this a Wonder Years style coming of age moment. Is that Turn Turn Turn I hear playing... nope. It`s the sound of Vince McMahon buying WCW. Sure it was fun for a while to see these dream matches, but the fun went away. Suddenly Vince McMahon was without competition and the product became dull. I still watched casually, but the last PPV I ever paid for was Wrestlemania 18. Watching WWE without any competition was like continuing to play Monopoly after wiping out your competitors. Sure you`ll get some action when you land on Chance, but everything else is just to safe. Needless to say Wrestlemania is not as exciting for me as it used to be.
In this edition I will be discussing the Road To this years Wrestlemania. This is the time where wrestling is always supposed to feel special. This is the time where viewers who may have lost interest come back to the fold. This is where every match should feel special. Sadly, with 5 weeks left, I am underwhelmed with the build up. The Elimination Chamber PPV was great. Solid matches boosted this PPV and made it one of the best WWE has had in a long time. Unfortunately, it was also the most predictable PPV in recent memory. There was no doubt surrounding the outcome of any match. Anyone who knew anything about wrestling would have been able to call the winner of every single match on the card. This has led to an unremarkable potential Wrestlemania 27 card. There are some highlights, but many more lowlights. This potential Wrestlemania has me begging for something to draw my interest.
The Miz vs. John Cena
I have spoken some about my disappointment with the build up of The Miz. It`s 5 weeks till Wrestlemania and he still feels like a second rate champion destined to be forgotten. So one would think WWE would do something remarkable to boost his stock leading up to Wrestlemania right... wrong. Their best idea to boost The Miz was to give him a clean win over Jerry Lawler, because you know how impressive it is for a 30 year old World Champion at the top of his game, beating a 61 year old, out of shape semi retired broadcaster is. To top things off, WWE has added The Rock as the guest host of Wrestlemania to add some star power. They are involving him in the Cena vs. Miz rivalry, clearly leading to the inevitable moment where The Rock raises Cena`s hand in victory and passes the torch. The Miz has now been made to feel like a supporting player in the main event, and he`s the defending champion. And seriously do we really need to see another Wrestlemania WWE title match with John Cena in it. He has been in the WWE Title 6 times prior to this. This will be his 7th consecutive Wrestlemania WWE Title Match. If he wins this one that will mean he has won the WWE title match at 6 of the last 7 Wrestlemania`s. Not even Hogan was used this much. Give someone else some time in the sun already.
Edge vs. Alberto Del Rio
This seems like an unremarkable match. Del Rio is awesome. He will be more than able to carry the work load in the ring, and on the mic. Edge, not so much. As a face he is lame on the mic, and he hasn`t been the same in the ring since his last injury. Though this match does offer something, and that is the potential of seeing Del Rio crowned World Heavyweight Champion. Though I remain skeptical about this. I would not be shocked if they keep the belt on Edge to keep the fans happy, and put it on Del Rio at the next PPV. Here`s hoping that this isn`t the case. I also am interested to see what Christian`s role will be in this rivalry. Having him come out and attack Del Rio when Del Rio had Edge in the Armbar at Elimination Chamber makes me wonder. Was that just a setup to Christian working against Del Rio after Mania, are they planning on making it a triple threat, or will they have Christian in Edge`s corner and turn on him to help Del Rio win. I would be happy with any of the three as it would give Christian a near main event program to work on. Then again they could just do what they`ve always done with Christian and decide to go nowhere with the storyline. Only time will tell.
The Undertaker vs. Triple H
This match seems to be getting a lot of buzz. I am marginally excited about this match. It is a good star power match. It continues on the Undertaker streak saga, and the Undertaker Shawn Michaels saga. I only have 2 problems, first can these two put on a good show. They are both fresh off of injuries. It is safe to assume that neither one will be putting in a heavy match load leading up to Mania. Will they be up to putting on a 5 star match. My other problem is, what ever happened to the new talent initiative. WWE had built in storylines between HHH and Sheamus, and Undertaker and Wade Barrett. These were the guys who put them out of action in the storyline. I know these matches wouldn`t have been as big of a draw, but it seems to me that Barret and Sheamus are getting left out in the cold on this one. That being said, this match is one of the more interesting one`s this year.
CM Punk vs. Randy Orton
I don`t have a whole lot to say about this one. Mostly because it is a pretty pointless rivalry. It seems too much like they just stuck these two together because they had nothing better to do with either of them. CM Punk is at the top of his game right now. I don`t think he has ever been this over. Orton... not so much. He was riding high, but has fizzled out lately. I think this will be a pretty good match, but I am still looking for a reason to care.
Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan
They seem to be setting this one up. Another what else do we do with these guys match. The U.S. Title felt like a big deal not too long ago. Now it seems like a joke. Mostly because the very talented Daniel Bryan has been reduced to dopey comedy with Gail Kim, and the Bella Twins. Sheamus is a 2 time WWE Champion, but lately has seemed like someone from NXT. These are two guys who 6 months back seemed like they were headed somewhere, and now the seem to be lost in the shuffle. Sheamus isn`t great in the ring, but he does show good agression, and Bryan can probably carry anyone to a great match... but again, who cares.
Wade Barrett vs. The Big Show
This one makes me angrier than any other potential match. Barrett is so much better than this. The Big Show is so lousy in the ring he makes Sid Vicious look like Ricky freaking Steamboat. In fact, from now on I will be referring to him as The Big Slow. Wade Barrett spent half of 2010 as the premiere heel in the WWE. There was no one more menacing, no one more commanding, and no one who got more mic time. Barrett was hot. This rivalry has killed his heat and made him feel like just another Smackdown guy. Plus they have done nothing to make Barrett look strong against The Big Slow. They have made Ezekiel Jackson look freakishly strong against The Big Slow by having him bodyslam, and suplex him without breaking a sweat. I hope they aren`t leading up to a handicap match where Barret and Zeke go against Big Slow. My only hope for this match is for them to involve Diesel. At the Royal Rumble they seemed to single out some moments between Barret and Diesel, and had Barrett eliminate him. As Diesel was leaving he exchanged a brief stare down with Big Slow. Though a tag match with these guys still screams bore, it would be cool to see Diesel in the match and would be a good novelty match.
Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole
This is the best thing going right now. Cole has been annoying as a broadcaster, but Lawler has stepped up and got the fans solidly behind him. I don't know if there is a WWE fan in the world who is not anxious to see Lawler beat the stuffing out of Cole. Will it be a match or will Lawler have to go through A-Ri to get a shot at Cole, I don`t know. All I know is that a potential match between a commentator and a semi retired 61 year old is the most well developed storyline on this card. How sad is that.
Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes
Let me sum up my feelings about this match in one word... BORING. So Mysterio is good in the ring, but lately he has been lazy. Every match he has has the same spots, and they have all gotten old. Rhodes is adequate, but unexciting. I just could not care less about this one, unless The Big Slow was involved. In the words of Forrest Gump, That`s all I have to say about that.
I personally am curious about what else there will be to come. there`s still several guys with no current story that deserve to be at Mania.
John Morrison - Is there anything I really need to say about this one. The guy is amazing. He was the scene stealer with his Spider Man moves at Royal Rumble and Elimination Chamber. Give this guy a reward.
Ted Dibease - His constant losing storyline and on the fringe relationship with Maryse has got to be leading somewhere. He is a solid performer and is getting better and better.
Kane - I have always thought Kane sucked, but he did have his best year ever out of his 13 plus lackluster years. He worked hard this year and deserves a Wrestlemania moment.
Drew McIntyre - Silly Kelly Kelly story aside. McIntyre has stepped it up lately. His performance at Elimination Chamber was great. He showed great charisma and intensity that he hadn't shown in the past.
Jack Swagger - In the past year Swagger has gone from MITB winner, to World Heavyweight Champion, to meaningless mid carder, to IC title contender back to meaningless mid carder. Though I believe he was pushed beyond his capacity as World Heavyweight Champion he deserves better than what he has now.
Dolph Ziggler - WWE owes him big for making him look like a chump and giving him the shortest title reign since Yokozuna won and lost the title at WM 9.
I do not know everything the future holds for this Wrestlemania. I do not even know if the matches I listed will all happen. What I do know is there is no way I will be wasting my money ordering this one. Maybe it will get better, but I doubt it.
