SNF: Las Vegas (1/16/11)

[Sedition: The Rev]

PRESENTS


THE SEASON FINALE!

Live from
LAS VEGAS, NEVADA, USA

**The show opens to a shot of the arena in Las Vegas. The crowd is on it's feet cheering, and Joe Aiello in on the floor trying to gnaw through his shackles. Skippy is flirting with one of the “legal” prostitutes in the crowd. He's caught off guard when the camera appears in his face.**

SKIPPY: Oh...... uh........ welcome to............ hey Joe............. JOE!

**Joe stops trying to break out of his chains and pops up on his feet.

JOE: What is it?

SKIPPY: It's the show intro, and I forgot the name again.

JOE: It's Sunday Night Fever!

SKIPPY: Is that it?

JOE: Yes. Explain to me why between the two of us you're the one who gets paid.

SKIPPY: Better connections is all.

JOE: Ladies and gentlemen, this is Sunday Night Fever, and it's the seaosn finale. That's right. We'll be off the air for the remainder of the winter before we return in the Spring with a new season. I'm hoping that I'll get some kind of off season release from my soul binding contract to this company. At this point, it's been so long since my family has seen me, I'd settle for supervised visits on weekends. Skippy, why don't you use those connections and get me an off season vacation.

SKIPPY: 'll see what I can do.

**Skippy hits the speed dial on his cell.**

SKIPPY: Hi, Rev. Listen, any chance Joe will be allowed to see his family during the upcoming off season? It's not like we'll have any shows for the next 2 months........ Uh huh........ uh huh.......... ok....... that's great news........... I'll let him know.

**Skippy hangs up. Joe looks ecstatic.**

SKIPPY: Good news.

JOE: Oh boy!

SKIPPY: Rev promises to not have you flogged for asking such a question.

JOE: And my hopes and dreams are crushed again. I need to find a way out of this. I can't stay in this company anymore.

SKIPPY: Tough luck. At least you have good company.

**Skippy gestures to the two buffoons from Got Milk, rolling on the floor and mooing next to Joe.**

JOE: Kill me.

SKIPPY: Not until the season's over. I hear it's a good finale.

------------------------------


MAIN EVENT
CHAMPION vs CHAMPION – NON TITLE

IAN DE TORNADO
-vs-
TEEN THROB



CASINO FLOOR BRAWL

BRANDEN HARVEY
-vs-
"GERIATRIC" WAYLON HAWTHORNE



FAN PARTICIPATION LUMBERJACK MATCH

HELL'S REJECT
-vs-
MISTIK


------------------------------

JOE: It's our fan participation lumberjack match up first. Lucky for all these Vegas fans. Unlucky for poor Reject and Mistik. Get ready for some chaos.

Hell's Reject -vs- Mistik

VIRGIL: This bout is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, standing at 6'1", and weighing 230 pounds, he hails from Hiroshima, Japan, please welcome HELL's REJECT!

The whole arena turns dark, then huge pyrotechnic explodes at the entrance stage, The song "The Devil" begins to play at the PA and the stage and ramp(side) are now starting to be filled with fire. Then at the middle of fire at the stage, Sinichi appears with in his pure white outfit and begins to walk slowly towards the ring. Upon entered the ring, he will then kneel on his one knee, raises his right open hand, then pulls it down as fire pyrotechnics explodes in the ring post.

Virgil: Introducing his opponent, he's a tall drink of water at 6'6" and he's a big-un as well, weighing 263 pounds, he hails from Las Vegas, Nevada, please welcome MISTIK!

As “Magic” by B.o.B. begins to play, the lights in the arena cut off, leaving only a lone spotlight shining on the entrance where Mistik, followed by a lovely lady assistant, walks out, waving to people as they cheer. The lady has a large, black sheet folded up. Mistik instructs the assistant to unfold the sheet and place it on him. She wait’s a few seconds before whipping it off him, only to show that he has disappeared. A second spotlight shines in the middle of the ring, revealing another beautiful lady assistant and another black sheet laying flat on the mat. She bends over and pulls up a bit, letting it hang for a few moments before throwing it to the side……..Only for Mistik to not be there, much to everyone’s confusion. Mistik’s whereabouts will be left to the writer’s discretion.

The bell rings, and both compeptitors begin to cautiously circle each other. They dive in for a tie-up, which Hell's Reject gets the best of. He forces Mistk back into the corner. Mistik ducks his head under the top rope, forcing the ref to break the tie up. The ref begins to force Hell's Reject back and Mistik cracks him in the mouth with a thudding right hook. Reject is stunned momentarily, but returns fire with a left hand of his own. Mistik folds and Reject begins to pummel him with hard forearm shots. Mistik momentarily breaks away and dives out of the ring to regroup. The fans begin to swarm him, but he threatens them and they back off. Just then, someone rushes behind Mistik and creams him with a beer bottle! Mistik crumbles to the floor, revealing that someone to be..

SKIPPY & AIELLO: CHARLES GRODIN![/color]

AIELLO: I loved him in Beethoven!

SKIPPY: You never know what celebs are going to appear in SWA.

AIELLO: Ones who were once midly famous?

Grodin begins directing traffic as one fan removes his prosthetic leg and begins to tee off on Mistik. Another fans snips off a lock of Mistik's hair. Three of the fans grab Mistik by the head and lead him back to the ring and slide him under the bottom rope, to a waiting Hell's Reject, who resumes his attack, stomping the back of Mistik. He lifts him up, and nails him with a flying roundhouse kick! He pins Mistik, hooking the leg.

1...

2...

Kick Out!

Reject pounds the mat in frustration. Reject pulls Mistik to his feet once more, and shoots him off into the ropes. Reject runs behind him to attack, but Mistik pulls down the top rope, sending Reject flying to the outside. Hell's Reject lands hard on the floor, and he is swarmed and mercilessly attacked by.....

SKIPPY&AIELLO: THE CAST OF 21 Jump Street!

AIELLO: Including Johnny Depp!

SKIPPY: I'm glad he's here, i've been wanting to give him a piece of mind about "Secret Window" for the longest.

Peter Deluise holds Reject's arms behind his back as Dustin Nyugen cracks him with a right hand! Johnny Depp takes his shot as well, laying out Hell's Reject on the concrete floor. Just then, the camera pans up back to the ring as we see a woman climbing the top rope....

SKIPPY & AIELLO: HOLLY ROBINSON PEETE!

Aiello: We seriously have to stop doing that.

Just as they say that, Holly dives off the top rope, landing a huge splash to Hell's Reject.

They pull him to his feet, and slide him under the bottom rope. Mistik goes on the offensive, cracking Hell's Reject with a European uppercut. He then shoots him off into the ropes. and on the return, takes him over with an arm drag. Reject pops up, and is taken down once again with a Dragon Screw Leg Whip. He picks him up, and tosses him into the corner. He shoots off, and crushes him with a corner lariat. Reject stumbles from the corner and falls to the mat. Mistik pins him, hooking the leg.

1...

2...

Kick Out!

Mistik briefly argues with the ref, alledging the count was slow. Meanwhile, Hell's Reject has returned to his feet and dives through the back of Mistik's knee, causing his leg to buckle. Reject backs into the ropes, but one of the lumberjacks, Reginald Vel Johnson from Family Matters fame, grabs his feet causing him to fall flat on his face.

AIELLO: That's an awfully dishonorable act from such a distinguished family man, Officer Winslow!

SKIPPY: I concur, i'd expect that sort of behavior from Leutenant Murtaugh, but never Carl.

Mistik drags Reject to his feet, and tosses him out of the ring again. The cast of 21 Jump Street moves to attack him once more, but Bob Saget hops the guardrail and gets in between them!

SKIPPY: Oh, great, they'll let anybody in here.

AIELLO: Tell me about it. What's next, a performance from Uncle Jesse and the Rippers to close the show?

Bob: I've seen enough!

He approaches Johnny Depp.

Bob: I may not be as famous or as cool as you, and i may not have your g-d good looks, but i'm not about to sit idly by why you attack this poor young man.

Johnny pretends to call of the dogs, but then cracks Bob Saget right in the nose!

SKIPPY: Ouch!

AIELLO: Ouch, indeed. Saget's got a good sized schnoz, he might have brain damage!

"THAT'S IT!"

An enraged fan screams and dives on Johnny Depp leveling him with punches. The rest of the fans at ringside join in too attacking the cast of 21 Jump Street!

JSKIPPY: We have a full fledged gang war at ringside here!

AIELLO: Washed up actors from the 90's vs. The People who watched them!

Meanwhile, Mistik is still alone in the ring, looking down at the floor for Hell's Reject. But he doesn't see that Reject has fully recovered and is measuring him from behind!

JOE: Oh, no, turn around!

But it's too late! Reject opens his mouth and gives Mistik the Devil's Spit! Mistik begins clawing frantically at his eyes! Hell's Reject grabs Mistik, and nails him with the Stairway to Hell! He pins him!

1....

2...

3!

Winner: Hell's Reject

Hell's Reject celebrates by kneeling while the war between the lumberjacks rages on at ringside.

AIELLO: Ladies and gentlemen, we just witnessed.......... I'm not completely sure what we just saw. It's a lot to take in. I do know that Hell's Reject just picked up another win here on Fever. He's on a roll.

SKIPPY: And it looks like Joey Lawrence just placed his old TV sister Blossom in a Figure Four. Whatever happened to good old family ties?

AIELLO: That would be Tina Yothers there with the flamethrower. We need to take a quick break and clean up the mess that just ensued. We'll be right back with more of our season finale after this.

____________________

[Sedition: The Rev]

(We open up backstage where we see Gabreal Martin talking with Olivia Saint.)

Olivia Saint: This has been a great few weeks. Easy sailing without my brother around.

Gabe: Yeah leave it to our brilliant leaders to get him put under house arrest.

O. Saint: Yeah it was a genius move by The Sedition.

(Michael Saint enters the room.)

Gabe: What are you doing here?

M. Saint: Your brilliant leaders only had me put under house arrest for a short amount of time. I have served that time.

Gabe: So you are back. Great, but hey be careful now if you lose this job most people will not hire a felon.

M. Saint: No I did not do anything at all you all just lied and I served my time.

Gabe: I heard you robbed a gas station.

O. Saint: Me too.

M. Saint: Well I will not put up with your crap anymore. I am here with a special message for you all.

Gabe: I know you are going to screw around with my career. I have heard it all before.

M. Saint: Oh that is not the speech I am giving today. This is going to be something different.

O. Saint: You hire someone to take him out. I mean it went so well last time you did that.

M. Saint: Better than that.

Gabe: Ok I am ready for this whatever it is.

M. Saint: SWA has been back in commision since April and you were signed to a contract by me.

Gabe: I know and then I went to the true genius of this federation The Sedition and aligned with them instead of you.

M. Saint: Well you were only signed to an 8 month contract. That contract has since expired. You are currently working without one.

Gabe: Yeah so I am sure Rev and Gladiator will sign me back soon.

M. Saint: Well I am here to tell you that is not needed. Your services are no longer needed in this company.

Gabe. What are you saying?

M. Saint: Gabreal Martin you are FIRED!

Gabe: You can't fire me! I will not stand for this.

M. Saint: Security do me a favor and escort Mr. Martin out of the arena.

(The security takes him off as he is screaming.)

Gabe: This is not over Saint! I am not the only person who has a reason to hate you. Even if I am not back I will find someone to replace me. You have a lot of enemies.

(Saint smiles as we fade out.)

_______________

JOE: YES!!!!!

SKIPPY: Nooo!!!!!!!

JOE: Finally somebody had the balls to fire the freeloader prima donna.

SKIPPY: Sain! fired The Chosen One!

JOE: No he didn't. Just Gabreal Martin. And I think I speak for all the fans when I say good riddance.

SKIPPY: Rev and Gladiator will not be happy about this.

JOE: Saint has power here too! I for one hope we never see that spoiled, arrogant, stuck up, lazy....

SKIPPY: The Sedition will have their revenge.

JOE: We'll see. Now we need to move on with the show. Seeing as we are in Las Vegas, it's only fitting that SWA features at least one match on the casino floor. That's what we have up next. Branden Harvey and Waylon Hawthorne are about to do battle out on the crowded casino floor.

SKIPPY: And maybe they'll hit the tables while they're there.

JOE: We go down to the casino floor, where Hawthorne and Harvey are ready to do battle..

Branden Harvey -vs- Waylon Hawthorne

The show cuts to a wide shot of a very active casino floor. The slot machines, blackjack and roulette tables are all packed. Security agents pace back and forth across a catwalk hanging from the ceiling so they can view anything suspicious on the floor. Anything suspicious, with the exception of Branden Harvey pushing past all the gamblers with a crowbar in his hands, and "Geriatric" Waylon Hawthorne storming through crowds of gamblers swinging (would you believe it) a farmers pitchfork in front of him to clear the way. Security has already been warned that SWA has a violent match scheduled for tonight.

SKIPPY: Harvey looks like he's about to pry open the casino vault and Hawthorne looks like he's going to be harvesting some crops.

AIELLO: Or stabbing Harvey with that pitchfork to open that never healing wound he got at Sadistic Rage.

Harvey and Hawthorne meet in the center of the casino gaming floor and both strike. Hawthorne jabs his pitchfork forward and Harvey knocks it out of the way with his crowbar. Harvey brings his crowbar up overhead and strikes downward to Hawthorne's skull, but Hawthorne brings his pitchfork up and locks the crowbar in between the spikes. They both take a step back. The crowds around them are oblivious to the match. Hawthorne and Harvey stare each other down and wait to strike. Hawthorne moves first, charging forward with the pitchfork while yelling out a battle cry. Harvey jumps out of the way. An enthusiastic gambler just won a couple of dollars on the slot machine. He turns around with his hands in the air.

GAMBLER: Hey, I won! Yahoo!!!!

Unfortunate for him, by Harvey jumping out of the way, old man Hawthorne ends up stabbing him directly in the chest with the pitchfork. The young man's enthusiasm disipates as blood starts to drip out of his chest. Hawthorne says "Oh geez.... sorry buddy" and then pulls the pitchfork out of his chest. Hawthorne turns around to try and find Harvey. The young gambler gurgles and drops to the ground, bleeding rapidly from the chest. Nobody around him even notices.

AIELLO: Someone just got stabbed in the chest by a pitchfork! Why isn't anyone helping?

SKIPPY: When gambling money is on the line, people tend to have a one track mind. Besides, Hawthorne helped.

AIELLO: He stabbed that poor kid in the chest! How did he help matters?

SKIPPY: He pulled the pitchfork out. Not to mention he apologized. What more do you want?

Hawthorne leaves the bleeding man behind and searches through the casino to find Harvey, who has disappeared among the crowd. Hawthroen pushes through the crowds, but slips right past Harvey, who has hidden between two slot machines. Harvey leaps out behind Hawthorne and starts choking him out from behind with the crowbar. Hawthorne stumbles around trying to shake Harvey off of his back. Hawthorne leans forward and flips Harvey off of his back. Harvey lands on top of a roulette wheel. The wheel was in the process of spinning when Harvey lande don it.

SKIPPY: Watch it's gonna land on bankrupt.

AIELLO: That's wheel of fortune you moron. This is roulette.

SKIPPY: What, is there a difference?

Harvey is on his back spinning around on the roulette wheel. Hawthorne cracks his back and neck and climbs on top of a slot machine. He aims and flies off the machine, landing on the spinning Harvey with a Flying elbow smash. The impact makes the wheel slow down and stop. The ball flies in the air and as Hawthorne starts draggingHarvey off the wheel, the ball drops and lands on Red 21! One lucky gambler cheers and throws Hawthorne a couple of chips.

AIELLO: Hawthorne's picking up some tips.

Hawthorne drags Harvey back over to one of the slot machines and bashes his head against it several times. Harvey holds his hand out to block. He steps on Hawthorne's foot and Clotheslines him down to the floor. As Hawthorne starts to pull himself up, Harvey finds his old crowbar on the ground and picks it up. Hawthorne is on his feet and he turns around to find Harvey swinging a crowbar into his face. Hawthorne ducks at the last second and Harvey's crowbar hits one of the slot machines. It breaks open and coins spill all over the casino floor. Gamblers everywhere flock to the broken machine. The frantic gamblers scoop up as much as they can. Security guards are instantly at the machine clubbing the gamblers. Harvey gets tackled to the ground and clubbed violently by the security.

AIELLO: So a man gets stabbed in the chest by a pitchfork and security doesn't bat an eye. Harvey accidentally breaks open a slot machine and he's clubbed by security.

SKIPPY: Makes sense to me. The casino loses no money over a stab victim. Broken slot machine on the other hand....

Hawthorne waits for the security to finish beating on Harvey. They finally turn their attention to the gamblers and Hawthorne moves in to cover.

1...




2...




Harvey barely kicks out. He picks up Harvey and whips him across the casino floor. Harvey runs right into a wall. Hawthorne walks slower (on account of being old) to catch up to Harvey. His attention is caught however by a blackjack table. Hawthorne looks back and forth between Harvey and the blackjack table. He then pulls out some chips from his pocket and takes a seat at the table.

AIELLO: Did he just forget he's in the middle of a match?

SKIPPY: Just stopping for a quick hand of blackjack. I'm sure Harvey will be there when the hand is over.

Hawthorne keeps asking the dealer to Hit. Harvey is on his feet and notices Hawthorne at the blackjack table. Harvey grabs a chair and approaches the table. He sneaks up on Hawthorne. Hawthorne says to the dealer "Hit me!".... 13..... "Hit me!"........ 17....... "Hit me!"....... 20........ "Hit me!"....... Harvey clocks Hawthorne over the head with the chair with a loud crack.

DEALER: Bust.

Harvey drags Hawthorne away from the blackjack table. He punches him repeatedly as they make their way across the floor. Harvey dropkicks Hawthorne through a set of double doors. He stumbles into the crowd in an auditoreum. Hawthorne is on his hands and knees, very dazed and looking forward at a man with great looking helmet hair singing on stage. Hawthorne's eyes go wide and a huge smile crosses his face.







Harvey lunges at Hawthorne, but Hawthorne springs to his feet and races up to the stage. Harvey picks himself up and chases after Hawthorne. As Wayne Newton belts it out on the stage, Hawthorne climbs on stage with him and starts dancing a jig to the catchy tune. Wayne Newton gives Hawthorne a weird look but keeps on singing.Harvey climbs up on the stage and kicks Hawthorne in the back. Hawthorne stumbles into one of the band members. Harvey flies forward with a Forearm, but Hawthorne dives out of the way and Harvey nails Wayne Newton, knocking him down on his back. Harvey stands over Wayne Newton trying to help him up, explaining that it was an accident. Wayne Newton holds his head in pain and takes Harvey's hand to help him up. The band is still playing. Newton is screaming at Harvey. Hawthorne comes from behind and places Harvey in a Full Nelson. He calls Wayne Newton over. Wayne Newton brings his fist back and punches Harvey in the face several times while Hawthorne holds him. Hawthorne lets go and Wayne Newton gives Harvey one last punch, causing him to spin around right into Hawthorne's arms. Hawthorne bends him down and scoops him up over his head, Powerbombing Harvey right off the stage into the front row. Hawthorne climbs off the stage and covers Harvey.

1...




2...





3!!!

Wayne Newton picks his mic back up and finishes the song as Hawthorne climbs on stage and dances his jig as the crowd goes crazy.


Winner: "Geriatric" Waylon Hawthorne


AIELLO: Unbelievable Okay, here's your typical SWA mid show rundown. A slew of washed up celebrtities, from Charles Grodin to Reginald Vel Johnson started a gang war in the opening match, Gabreal Martin was fired by Michael Saint, a man was stabbed in the chest by a pitchfork and is probably still bleeding to detah of the casino floor, and Wayne Newton helped Hawthorne double team for the win.

SKIPPY: Don't forget that Hawthorne stopped in mid match to gamble, and proved that he sucks at blackjack.

AIELLO: Of course. And we still have the main event to come here on our Season Finale of Fever. It's Champion vs Champion after this commercial break.

[Sedition: The Rev]

___________

**In the backstage offices of Rev and Gladiator.**

REV: Saint can't get away with this. We need to get our lawyers on this to have Gabe reinstated.

GLADIATOR: Why not......... just let it go.

REV: What??? You want to let Saint win?

GLADIATOR: So he fired Gabreal Martin.

REV: The nerve of him. This is our company. We're supposed to call the shots here.

GLADIATOR: But Saint does have the power to do this. We can try and fight it, and may win, but what would we gain? Gabreal Martin should have won the SWA Title by now. He's not only failed every time the belt was on the line, but he spent months dodging challenges. We spent more money paying his salary than anyone else on the roster, and he spent most of the Fall on a beach working on his tan. Maybe Gabe was the wrong guy from the beginning.

REV: All true, but where does that leave us? This is our company, and we need to have a champion on our pay roll.

GLADIATOR: It's the season finale, The show returns to the air in the Spring. That gives us at least two months to search the world for the deadliest, scariest, most skilled, most violent, most sadistic and unstoppable force in professional wrestling. We can find a new Chosen One. Someone hand picked by us, and up to challenge of dethroning that pain in our side, Ian DeTornado. We have our pick.

REV: Yes............ yes................ Next season we'll have a new apprentice. One far stronger and more powerful!.

**Rev and Gladiator put on their best “evil expressions” as it fades back to the arena.**

______________

SKIPPY: Can't wait until next season.

JOE: Hopefully their next hand picked star will be less of a brat than Gabreal. But the question is, can Rev and Gladiator find anyone who can dethrone Ian DeTornado. He's held onto the SWA Championship ever since Spring Breakdown. Perhaps Teen Throb has what it takes to knock him down. He's been a impressive Extreme Combat Champion since winning back at Apocalypse Now. And here we are, on the season finale, about to see Champion vs Champion. Keep in mind, neither title is on the line, but one of our champions is going to walk out of here with the hugest bragging right. It's the main event, here on our season finale of Sunday Night Fever.

Ian DeTornado -vs- Teen Throb

As the opening harmonies from Watch Out's song Babe You Know You Want Me begin, every man in the arena groans. The girls, at least those under the age of 30 all scream. Teen Throb's pretty ol' face flashes on the big screen and he dances down the aisle in traditional boy band fashion. Once entering the ring Teen Throb lip syncs his own lyrics and swivels his hips to please his fans.

VIRGIL: Introducing first, Hailing from Grand Forks, North Dakota, weighing in at 210 lbs, he is the girliest Extreme Combat Champion in history, TEEN THROB!!!

As the intro of his Theme song (The Man from Manila) plays through the P.A., Red and Blue smoke effects covers the entrance stage... Then from the middle of the smoke a (Philippine infamous) jeepney will drive from the entrance to the middle of the ramp.

then upon reaching the middle of the ramp, ianzky will jump off from the driver's seat and will climb the ring post, point to the audience before doing a back flip towards the middle of the ring.

VIRGIL: His opponent, hailing from the great city of Manila, weighing in at a trim 180 lbs, he is the only SWA Champion to ever moonlight as a hip disc jockey, IAN DETORNADO!!!

Teen Throb charges at Tornado and hits him with a flying forearm. He mounts himself on top of Tornado and nails him with a series of punches to the head. Teen Throb picks Tornado off the mat and whips him off the ropes. Tornado bounces off the ropes and Teen Throb hits him with a Dropkick. Teen Throb picks Tornado up and applies a side headlock. Tornado shoves Teen Throb towards the ropes and Tornado catches him in a Sleeper Hold on the rebound. Teen Throb lifts Tornado off the mat and backs into the corner, smashing Tornado ito the turnbuckle. Tornado releases the Sleeper hold and Teen Throb places Tornado on the top turnbuckle. Teen Throb climbs up and sets Tornado up for Superplex, but Tornado shoves Teen Throb off the top rope. Teen Throb hits the mat. Tornado stands up on the top rope and dives off with a Guillotine Leg Drop, but Teen Throb rolls out of the way. Tornado crashes down on the canvas. Teen Throb picks him up and delivers a Piledriver. Teen Throb goes for the cover,

1...

2...

Tornado kicks out. Teen Throb picks him up and delivers a Bridging Northern Lights Suplex for the pin attempt,

1...

2...

Tornado kicks out. Teen Throb climbs up on the top rope and drops down on Tornado with a flying Elbow Smash. Teen Throb goes for the cover,

1...

2...

Tornado kicks out.

AIELLO: Teen Throb seems determined to put the champ away early.

SKIPPY: Great, the earlier the match ends the sooner I can start hitting on the redhead in the third row.

Teen Throb picks Tornado up and throws him out of the ring. Tornado hits the ground and slowly gets to his feet. Teen Throb bounces off the ropes and jumps over the top rope with a Suicide Dive. He hits Tornado and both men hit the ground. Teen Throb grabs a chair from ringside. He folds the chair and waits for Tornado to get up. Tornado gets to his feet and Teen Throb swings the chair. Tornado ducks and the chair smashes into the ringpost. Teen Throb drops the Chair and Tornado picks it up. Teen Throb faces Tornado and Tornado hits him over the head with the chair. Tornado drops the chair and throws Teen Throb back into the ring.

AIELLO: I wasn't aware this was an extreme combat rules match.

SKIPPY: Joe, this is the SWA. If a referee disqualifies someone for a chair shot he takes a cut in pay and loses a thumb.

AIELLO: They lose a thumb?

SKIPPY: Violence equals ratings Joe. You should here what they do if a referee counts someone out.

Tornado climbs up on the top rope. He jumps off and drops down on Teen Throb with a Corkscrew Moonsault. He goes for the cover,

1...

2...

Teen Throb kicks out. Tornado picks Teen Throb up and knees him in the gut. Tornado bounces off the ropes and catches Teen Throb with a Swinging Neckbreaker. Tornado then stands in the corner and leaps up to the top rope. He jumps off and crashes down on Teen Throb with a Frog Splash. Tornado goes for the cover,

1...

2...

Teen Throb gets his leg up on the bottom rope. Tornado gets up and places Teen Throb on the top turnbuckle. Tornado clibs up on the top rope and attempts a Super Hurricanranna, but Teen Throb reverses into a Super Powerbomb in mid air. Both men hit the mat hard. The Ref begins to count both men down 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, Teen Throb crawls over and covers Tornado,

1...

2...

Tornado kicks out.

SKIPPY: Phew! Teen Throb just saved that ref from a scalping.

AIELLO: A SCALPING! What kind of sick people am I working for? Wait... Never mind I already know the answer to that question.

Teen Throb gets up on his feet and so does Tornado. They charge at each other and both hit each other with a Clothesline. The ref counts them down again 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, the ref starts to sweat and hold his hand over his scalp as he continues to count 7, 8, Teen Throb gets up to his feet and the ref breathes a sigh of relief. Teen Throb climbs out of the ring and grabs a chair. Meanwhile inside the ring Tornado leans over the apron and picks up a chair off the ground. Teen Throb climbs into the ring and Tornado stands up with his back turned to Teen Throb. Tornado turns around and both men hit eachother over the head with their chairs. Both men fall down to the mat.

AIELLO: Fans, it sickens me to say this, but we may see a scalping before the night is through.

SKIPPY: I hope Montacor is sharpening his knives backstage.

The ref prepares to start counting. Montacor, the leader of Gladiator's monkey army comes out brandishing a shiny knife. He looks at the referee and shakes his head. The ref opts to not count them down. Slowly Teen Throb and Tornado both rise to their feet. Teen Throb picks up the chair again, but the ref tries to stop him from using it. Montacor sticks up his thumb and shakes his head no. The ref looks at his thumb and let's go of the chair. Tornado picks up a chair as well. The ref is watching Montacor who is juggling two knives. He slowly backs away from the ropes with fear in his eyes. Teen Throb and Tornado both swing their chairs and the ref unknowingly steps into the line of fire. The ref gets sandwiched in between both chairs and falls down to the ground. Montacor laughs and returns to the backstage area. Tornado shows concern and kneels down to check on the ref. Teen Throb runs at him and hits him with a running chair shot. Teen Throb rolls out of the ring and reaches under the apron. He starts pulling weapons out. Crutch, sledgehammer, the ever dangerous cookie sheet, finally he pulls out a severed electrical cable. A smile creeps across his face. As Teen Trhob carefully picks the cable up, being extra careful not to touch the exposed wires, Tornado sneaks up behind him with the ever dangerous cookie sheet. Teen Throb turns around with the cable in hand, and Tornado hits him over the head with the cookies sheet. Of course this does little damage, because it's only a measly little cookie sheet, but Teen Throb does stagger back and trip over the crutch. The cable flies into the air. As Teen Throb falls he trips Tornado down to the ground. The cable falls between them and exposed wires touch both of their skin. Sparks fly and both men convulse as they receive the shock. The power surges and the lights breifly go out. When the lights come back up, both men are unconcious on the floor. Stagehands are moving the cable away.

AIELLO: This match just got really ugly. I think someone should call this match off.

SKIPPY: That would not be in the best intrests of ratings Joe.

AIELLO: This place gets more and more disgusting each week.

A new ref gets into the ring and starts counting both men out. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, Montacor runs out with one knife in each hand. He slides into the ring and the ref slides out. Montacor follows laughing maniacally while chasing the referee around the ring. As Montacor and the ref runs circles around the ring, Teen Throb and Tornado both start to show signs of life. They slowly climb back into the ring. Both men are dazed and unsure of what's going on. Outside the ring Montacor is gaining on the ref. Suddenly from out of nowhere, the cows of Got Milk? come out from under the ring. Cow #1 grabs Montacor, and Cow #2 boots him like he's a foot ball. Montacor flies through the air and lands in the aisle. He lies lifeless on the ground.

AIELLO: Ha, take that you stupid monkey. Good work cows.

SKIPPY: Hold on Montacor, I'll save you!

Skippy dashes over to help Montacor. He kneels down next to him and starts administering CPR. Cow #1 helps the terrified referee back into the ring as Cow #2 revives the unconscious referee in the ring. Teen Thron and Tornado are still stumbling around like two drunken fools. Tornado backs into Teen Throb. Teen Throb suddenly realizes what is going on a delivers a Bridging German Suplex for the pin attempt. Both men's shoulders are pinned to the mat. Both referees get in position to make the count,

1...




2...





3!!!

Both refs call for the bell. One ref raises Tornado's hand, and the other raises Teen Throb's hand. The refs start arguing. Tornado and Teen Throb seem oblivious to everything going on around them as they lie on the mat semi concious. The refs continue to bicker. Skippy seems to have given up trying to revive Montacor. He picks him up and carries him backstage with tears in his eyes. Finally the refs reach a consensus and tell Virgil the verdict.

VIRGIL: Ladies and gentlemen I have been informed that since both mens shoulders were pinned to the mat, this match, one of the most bizarre matches in SWA history, has been ruled a draw!

AIELLO: We have no decision! Which champion is superior? Will we ever find out? Look at Skippy over there still giving CPR to Montacor! Will he be able to revive him? Wait a second........ where are you guys taking me? I want to see my family! Get your hands off of me! The showe's not over yet. What about a winner? What about Montacor? What about my freedom?

**The fans are all on the edge of their seats as Joe is ushered away by security. The Las Vegas fans are getting very worked up over the ending. Thanks to the old ganbg from 21 Jump Street and that violent instigator Bob Saget, another riot breaks out. Security guards rush Teen Throb and Ian DeTornado out of the ring. The entire arena is rioting, except for Skippy who's still giving mouth to mouth to Montacor the monkey, pausing occasionally to give mouth to mouth to one of the fully conscious prostitutes. The riot is quickly out of control. Joe Aiello is forced out the back door just as the tear gas fills the building.**

________

Some of the tear gas drifts out the door after Joe and the aggressive security guards. The doors close behind them and the guards chain the doors shut. Aiello is being lead across the parking lot in shackles by two Sedition guards, two more guards wait near a blacked out van. Aiello struggles against the guards and chains but it doesn't do him any good.-

Aiello: Let me go! I've got a family.

Guard: Shut up Aiello.

Aiello: Look, if you let me go, I'll say that over powered you and escaped myself.

Guard: Ha! Like that would ever happen.

-Aiello headbutts the guard, the other guard hits him with a baton. Aiello falls to his knees.-

Guard: Do we really need to do this ever week Joe?

-Aiello spits in his face. -

Aiello: Yes!


- The guards from the van start to walk towards Aiello and the other guards. They cover half the distance when suddenly a golf cart comes speeding across the parking lot. Got Milk? is behind the wheel, mooing loudly as the swerve the cart back and forth. They moo wildly as they crash the cart into the two guards, sending them to the ground.

Cow #1 jumps from the passenger seat and charges at the guards with a putting iron in his his hands. He swings and connects with one guard while the other runs away. As Aiello takes one look at the knocked out guards, and the now burning arena behind them, Aiello scrambles to get onto the golf cart as Got Milk? makes their get away The picture fades to black-

SWA WILL RETURN IN THE SPRING...

Copyright: 2011 Sedition Production

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Hell's Reject vs Mistik written by Chambers
Hawthorne vs Harveyk written by Rev
Teen Throb vs Tornado written by Gladiator