Post by Teen Throb on Nov 29, 2010 7:56:25 GMT -6
Voice- We now return to the 1st Annual Teen Throb Rules the Universe Awards show!
{-- An auditoreum full of screaming girls are shown on camera. Babe You Know You Want Me is being played by an orchestra on the floor in front of the stage which has giant statues of Teen Throb striking a sexy pose on each side. The screams of delight and applause dies down and a couple of celebrities come out on stage. --}
Voice-And now to present this years award for Best Abs in a Teen Throb video please welcome grammy award winner and part time call girl, Christina Aguileral!
{-- It cuts away from the awards show and to backstage where we find Teen Throb wearing a tuxedo with the jacket and shirt flaps open so he can showcase his beautiful abs. His band mates Jerry, Jack and Jaswinder are all standing behind him. The band is watching the show on a screen. --}
Jerry- I can't believe you created your own award show just so you can win something.
Jack- I can't believe he spent all of the 2009 royalties to pay for this show.
Jaswinder- Yeah seriously dude, I had credit cards to pay off with that.
TT- You have to spend money to make money.
Jaswinder- How are we going to make money off of this show?
Jerry- We can sell Christina Aguilera as a call girl for starters.
TT- I don't have to explain my money making schemes to you. I've always brought in the big dough just trust me with what I'm good at.
Jack- We haven't had a Platinum disc since 2002. That's why we keep losing all the awards. That's why we lost to Taylor Lautner at the Teen Dream awards. That's why we lost to Justin Beiver at the American Music awards. Face it. We're getting old. The fans still love us but not as much as the new younger guys. You're pushing 30 Teen Throb.
TT- I am not. I'm pushing 29.
Jack- Whatever.
TT- Don't even talk to me about Taylor Lautner and Justin Beiber. Those guys are jokes. They don't even compare to the talent I have. Not to mention Teen Dream awards mean nothing. They're almost as pathetic as American Music awards. This is a show for the fans and decided by the fans. It's always been the most prestigious show. That's why we're here.
Jaswinder- You created it for yourself and it's the first show we've ever held.
TT- I'll let the categories speak for themselves. Everything I do I do to perfection. Taylor Lautner and Justin Beiber have nothing on me. The same as Larsen VanDer Kamp and Brandon Harvey have nothing on me. I've been taken for granted as an entertainer for too long. I'm the leader of the greatest boy band this country has ever seen but is anyone giving me the awards? Not one. I'm the hardest working wrestler in the business. I'm the Extreme Combat champion. Does anyone give me the credit I deserve? Not yet. I won this title by drowning an SWA legends. I should be in the main event defending my superior title not Ian DeTornado. But I'll prove all of that tomorrow at Sadistic Rage. Tonight is about me getting my long over due regognition as a singer.
{-- Christina Aguilera is announcing the winner of the award on the stage. Teen Throb ties his bowtie around his bare neck. --}
Jerry- So you're not going to use this mockery of an award show to brag on yourself and rip away Harvey and Larsen's dignity?
TT- This is an award show celebrating the best in music. I'm already the extreme champ. I don't need to use this show as a forum to sell myself as a wrestler. I do all my talking in the ring.
{-- Christina Aguilere announces Teen Throb as the winner. He walks out on stage pretending to look all shocked. She hands the mini trophy of Teen Throb striking a sexy pose into Teen Throb's hands. --}
TT- What an absolute shock. I thought Jack as a shoe-in for this one. Thanks for the award fans. I want to take this opportunity to present our next couple of awards. Here comes the next category.
{-- The orchestra strikes a couple of fanfare notes. Teen Throb places his trophy back on the podium and pulls the mike to his face. --}
TT- Your nominees for the award of “Worst failure as an athlete who makes up a phony action/military fused career as a special forces commando out of some bad Matt Damon remake of a Charles Bronson straight to video suckfest, that if he really was a man of action and awesome military special forces commando, danger striking, fist punching, gun loading, bullet flying man of war like he claims he is, wouldn't he be fighting Osama and Hussein and Obama Hussein and all the other terrorists instead of picking up a paycheck for $650 a week as an undercard winner but main event loser in Seditions Wrestling Alliance?”
{-- Silence from the crowd. --}
TT- Your nominees are Larsen Van Der Kamp.
{-- More silence. --}
TT- And the winner is
{-- Drumm roll --}
TT- Larsen Vander Kamp! Accepting the award on his behalf is Golden Globe winning actor Charlie Sheen playing the role of Larsen Van der Kamp.
{{-- And here comes Charlie Sheen stumbling on stage spilling his towering glass of liquor. He's wearing a Larsen Van de Kamp shirt. --}
Charlie Sheen- Thanks for the award. My name is Largo Vanderwall and I flop in title matches. This trophy will go nicely with my collection of titles that I've won. Oh sorry. Never did that.
{-- Charlie Sheen takes a swig of his drink but only half of what he sips make it down his throat. The rest soaks the front of his shirt and dribbles on the floor --}
Charlie Sheen- I forget my lines already. Bring on the hookers!
{-- Teen Throb pushes Sheen to the side of the stage. Christina Aguilera takes his arm and leads him backstage. --}
TT- Now for our next award. Now for the nominees in the category of “Worst wrestler in the history of this sport to win next to no matches and then catch the luckiest break in the entire history of wrestling to land himself in a title shot even though he's more or less a jobber that belongs in the dark match against the Brooklyn Brawler or that retard Eugene, and even though he's lucky and found a way to get booked as a challenger for the greatest title in the SWA the Extreme Combat which is held by the sexiest and deadliest man in the business who the ladies love and call Teen Throb, we know very well this jobber will soon be performing in bingo halls and community halls with Jonny Fairplay and a seriously coked out Jake the Snake Roberts, cause after Sadistic Rage when he's owned in the ring like the little girl he is everyone watching in the stands, backstage and on ppv around the world will see him for the worthless, but never the less lucky and should count himself as priveleged to be in the same ring with much more serious and talented competition”
{-- The fans in the auditoreum are starting to shrug their shoulders and scratch their heads. --}
TT- The nominee and sole winer is none other than Brandon Harvey! To accept the award on Brandon Harvey's behalf is a returning Charlie Sheen playing the role of Brandon Harvey.
{-- Charlie Sheen is coming back on stage trying to put on a Brandon Harvey short but he refuses to drop his glass. The short is caught on his head. He can't see where he's going and trips and falls. --}
TT- That's it. Next year I get Emilio instead. We'll be back after this commercial break.
{-- The show goes to a commercial and Teen Throb goes backstage. The other guys from Watch Out are shaking their heads at him. --}
TT- What?
Jack- Nice and subtle.
Jaswinder- So much for doing your talking in the ring.
TT- I was only reading the categories and winners. I keep telling you. This is how the fans voted. I can't help it if they all see Larsen for the phony he is and Brandon for the lucky but undeserving challenger that he is. These guys have never even entered a ring with me and they think they know what Extreme combat is all about? Give me a break. The fans have spoken. They know better.
Jerry- Larsen has been in the ring with you before.
Jaswinder- That's true. He won.
TT- Never happened.
Jaswinder- Did too. I saw it with my own eyes.
TT- Must be the other Teen Throb you were watching. Brandon Harvey and Larsen may have some skill in the ring, but extreme combat is a whole different ball game. To win in extreme combat you have to be willing to fight to the death. I think I'm still the only guy to drown an opponent in a sanctioned match. This time we'll be above spikes. The winner is the one to impale an opponent. Despite Larsen's claims I still say I'm the only one who has ever proven himself willing and able to take a human life to win a match. That's why these guys are no contest for me. Be quiet. It's time for the final award.
{-- The announcers voice is heard giving out the final award of the evening. --}
Voice- You fans have voted, and the results were staggering. The award for Musical Entertainer of the Century goes to:
{-- Drum roll. Teen Throb is already stepping through the curtain as the name of the winner is announced. --}
Voice- Justin Beiber!
TT- What? No! That's not possible! I thought the votes were rigged in my favor! This can't be happening again!
{-- Jack puts a hand on Teen Throb's shoulder to comfort him. --}
Jack- It just wasn't meant to be. I told you the girls want someone younger these days. Young enough to still be potty training, but still younger than us.
{-- As Beiber is handed his trophy and walks back to his seat the announcer speaks again. --}
Voice- And this award was a tie. The votes were split down the middle.
TT- Oh good. I was worried there for a second that my own fans forgot me. A tie is still a win.
Voice- The other winner for Musical Entertainer of the Century is:
{-- Drum roll --}
Voice: Taylor Lautner!
{-- Even the other guys in Watch Out look confused. The girls are going nuts as Taylor comes up to the stage to accept his award. --}
TT- How is this possible? The guy is not even a singer? Why does this keep happening to me? I've had it. I'm getting some impaling practice.
{-- Teen Throb grabs an impaling spear that just seemed to be sitting around and runs on stage after Taylor Lautner. Taylor screams like a girl, which is a lot like a Justin Beiber chorus. The award show and the scene fade away with Teen Throb chasing a screaming Taylor Lautner around the auditoreum. --}
{-- An auditoreum full of screaming girls are shown on camera. Babe You Know You Want Me is being played by an orchestra on the floor in front of the stage which has giant statues of Teen Throb striking a sexy pose on each side. The screams of delight and applause dies down and a couple of celebrities come out on stage. --}
Voice-And now to present this years award for Best Abs in a Teen Throb video please welcome grammy award winner and part time call girl, Christina Aguileral!
{-- It cuts away from the awards show and to backstage where we find Teen Throb wearing a tuxedo with the jacket and shirt flaps open so he can showcase his beautiful abs. His band mates Jerry, Jack and Jaswinder are all standing behind him. The band is watching the show on a screen. --}
Jerry- I can't believe you created your own award show just so you can win something.
Jack- I can't believe he spent all of the 2009 royalties to pay for this show.
Jaswinder- Yeah seriously dude, I had credit cards to pay off with that.
TT- You have to spend money to make money.
Jaswinder- How are we going to make money off of this show?
Jerry- We can sell Christina Aguilera as a call girl for starters.
TT- I don't have to explain my money making schemes to you. I've always brought in the big dough just trust me with what I'm good at.
Jack- We haven't had a Platinum disc since 2002. That's why we keep losing all the awards. That's why we lost to Taylor Lautner at the Teen Dream awards. That's why we lost to Justin Beiver at the American Music awards. Face it. We're getting old. The fans still love us but not as much as the new younger guys. You're pushing 30 Teen Throb.
TT- I am not. I'm pushing 29.
Jack- Whatever.
TT- Don't even talk to me about Taylor Lautner and Justin Beiber. Those guys are jokes. They don't even compare to the talent I have. Not to mention Teen Dream awards mean nothing. They're almost as pathetic as American Music awards. This is a show for the fans and decided by the fans. It's always been the most prestigious show. That's why we're here.
Jaswinder- You created it for yourself and it's the first show we've ever held.
TT- I'll let the categories speak for themselves. Everything I do I do to perfection. Taylor Lautner and Justin Beiber have nothing on me. The same as Larsen VanDer Kamp and Brandon Harvey have nothing on me. I've been taken for granted as an entertainer for too long. I'm the leader of the greatest boy band this country has ever seen but is anyone giving me the awards? Not one. I'm the hardest working wrestler in the business. I'm the Extreme Combat champion. Does anyone give me the credit I deserve? Not yet. I won this title by drowning an SWA legends. I should be in the main event defending my superior title not Ian DeTornado. But I'll prove all of that tomorrow at Sadistic Rage. Tonight is about me getting my long over due regognition as a singer.
{-- Christina Aguilera is announcing the winner of the award on the stage. Teen Throb ties his bowtie around his bare neck. --}
Jerry- So you're not going to use this mockery of an award show to brag on yourself and rip away Harvey and Larsen's dignity?
TT- This is an award show celebrating the best in music. I'm already the extreme champ. I don't need to use this show as a forum to sell myself as a wrestler. I do all my talking in the ring.
{-- Christina Aguilere announces Teen Throb as the winner. He walks out on stage pretending to look all shocked. She hands the mini trophy of Teen Throb striking a sexy pose into Teen Throb's hands. --}
TT- What an absolute shock. I thought Jack as a shoe-in for this one. Thanks for the award fans. I want to take this opportunity to present our next couple of awards. Here comes the next category.
{-- The orchestra strikes a couple of fanfare notes. Teen Throb places his trophy back on the podium and pulls the mike to his face. --}
TT- Your nominees for the award of “Worst failure as an athlete who makes up a phony action/military fused career as a special forces commando out of some bad Matt Damon remake of a Charles Bronson straight to video suckfest, that if he really was a man of action and awesome military special forces commando, danger striking, fist punching, gun loading, bullet flying man of war like he claims he is, wouldn't he be fighting Osama and Hussein and Obama Hussein and all the other terrorists instead of picking up a paycheck for $650 a week as an undercard winner but main event loser in Seditions Wrestling Alliance?”
{-- Silence from the crowd. --}
TT- Your nominees are Larsen Van Der Kamp.
{-- More silence. --}
TT- And the winner is
{-- Drumm roll --}
TT- Larsen Vander Kamp! Accepting the award on his behalf is Golden Globe winning actor Charlie Sheen playing the role of Larsen Van der Kamp.
{{-- And here comes Charlie Sheen stumbling on stage spilling his towering glass of liquor. He's wearing a Larsen Van de Kamp shirt. --}
Charlie Sheen- Thanks for the award. My name is Largo Vanderwall and I flop in title matches. This trophy will go nicely with my collection of titles that I've won. Oh sorry. Never did that.
{-- Charlie Sheen takes a swig of his drink but only half of what he sips make it down his throat. The rest soaks the front of his shirt and dribbles on the floor --}
Charlie Sheen- I forget my lines already. Bring on the hookers!
{-- Teen Throb pushes Sheen to the side of the stage. Christina Aguilera takes his arm and leads him backstage. --}
TT- Now for our next award. Now for the nominees in the category of “Worst wrestler in the history of this sport to win next to no matches and then catch the luckiest break in the entire history of wrestling to land himself in a title shot even though he's more or less a jobber that belongs in the dark match against the Brooklyn Brawler or that retard Eugene, and even though he's lucky and found a way to get booked as a challenger for the greatest title in the SWA the Extreme Combat which is held by the sexiest and deadliest man in the business who the ladies love and call Teen Throb, we know very well this jobber will soon be performing in bingo halls and community halls with Jonny Fairplay and a seriously coked out Jake the Snake Roberts, cause after Sadistic Rage when he's owned in the ring like the little girl he is everyone watching in the stands, backstage and on ppv around the world will see him for the worthless, but never the less lucky and should count himself as priveleged to be in the same ring with much more serious and talented competition”
{-- The fans in the auditoreum are starting to shrug their shoulders and scratch their heads. --}
TT- The nominee and sole winer is none other than Brandon Harvey! To accept the award on Brandon Harvey's behalf is a returning Charlie Sheen playing the role of Brandon Harvey.
{-- Charlie Sheen is coming back on stage trying to put on a Brandon Harvey short but he refuses to drop his glass. The short is caught on his head. He can't see where he's going and trips and falls. --}
TT- That's it. Next year I get Emilio instead. We'll be back after this commercial break.
{-- The show goes to a commercial and Teen Throb goes backstage. The other guys from Watch Out are shaking their heads at him. --}
TT- What?
Jack- Nice and subtle.
Jaswinder- So much for doing your talking in the ring.
TT- I was only reading the categories and winners. I keep telling you. This is how the fans voted. I can't help it if they all see Larsen for the phony he is and Brandon for the lucky but undeserving challenger that he is. These guys have never even entered a ring with me and they think they know what Extreme combat is all about? Give me a break. The fans have spoken. They know better.
Jerry- Larsen has been in the ring with you before.
Jaswinder- That's true. He won.
TT- Never happened.
Jaswinder- Did too. I saw it with my own eyes.
TT- Must be the other Teen Throb you were watching. Brandon Harvey and Larsen may have some skill in the ring, but extreme combat is a whole different ball game. To win in extreme combat you have to be willing to fight to the death. I think I'm still the only guy to drown an opponent in a sanctioned match. This time we'll be above spikes. The winner is the one to impale an opponent. Despite Larsen's claims I still say I'm the only one who has ever proven himself willing and able to take a human life to win a match. That's why these guys are no contest for me. Be quiet. It's time for the final award.
{-- The announcers voice is heard giving out the final award of the evening. --}
Voice- You fans have voted, and the results were staggering. The award for Musical Entertainer of the Century goes to:
{-- Drum roll. Teen Throb is already stepping through the curtain as the name of the winner is announced. --}
Voice- Justin Beiber!
TT- What? No! That's not possible! I thought the votes were rigged in my favor! This can't be happening again!
{-- Jack puts a hand on Teen Throb's shoulder to comfort him. --}
Jack- It just wasn't meant to be. I told you the girls want someone younger these days. Young enough to still be potty training, but still younger than us.
{-- As Beiber is handed his trophy and walks back to his seat the announcer speaks again. --}
Voice- And this award was a tie. The votes were split down the middle.
TT- Oh good. I was worried there for a second that my own fans forgot me. A tie is still a win.
Voice- The other winner for Musical Entertainer of the Century is:
{-- Drum roll --}
Voice: Taylor Lautner!
{-- Even the other guys in Watch Out look confused. The girls are going nuts as Taylor comes up to the stage to accept his award. --}
TT- How is this possible? The guy is not even a singer? Why does this keep happening to me? I've had it. I'm getting some impaling practice.
{-- Teen Throb grabs an impaling spear that just seemed to be sitting around and runs on stage after Taylor Lautner. Taylor screams like a girl, which is a lot like a Justin Beiber chorus. The award show and the scene fade away with Teen Throb chasing a screaming Taylor Lautner around the auditoreum. --}