Post by Prodigy on Oct 3, 2010 12:37:59 GMT -6
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
October 1, 2010
5:30 p.m.
*The scene opens in a wrestling ring within a large gym. As if on cue, a man wearing a black zip-up hoodie and black track pants with a white stripe down the side sprints over to the ropes and bounces back and fourth across the ring. He then comes to a stop in the middle of the ring and begins to shadowbox*
?-?-?
“Oh yeah! Feel the burn baby! You know what I’m sayin’ man? Do you know…what I’m saying?”
*The man stops shadowboxing and motions the cameraman forward as the hood still conceals his identity*
?-?-?
"Get a little closer.”
*The cameraman moves forward until he collides with the man, who now stumbles back mumbling bleeped out obscenities*
?-?-?
“What the hell man?! For pete’s sake…”
*The man moves back to his position in the middle of the ring and pulls his hood down revealing himself to be Ultimo Doom with a super rad awesome new red and black mask. He then reaches down to the canvas and picks up a fresh chimichanga*
Ultimo Doom
“Look at this dude! I LOVE chimichangas!”
*Ultimo Doom pulls up his mask with his free hand and takes a bite out of the chimichanga*
Ultimo Doom
“So…right off the bat, yes I did lose to PsyDrag, but the last thing I want to do is act like a big ole crybaby about it. Probably because I’ve already acted like a big ole crybaby about it.”
*Ultimo Doom erupts into loud obnoxious laughter and begins to march about the ring holding his belly. He then stops in the middle of the ring and takes another bite of the chimichanga*
Ultimo Doom
“Psycho Dragon is the SWA Sensation and even I couldn’t stop his rise. He was more motivated and more driven than I was, but I’ve learned from that. You could even say that I have evolved. Oh yes, taking a Shoryuken from PsyDrag and becoming a flaming marshmallow was Ultimo Doom’s radioactive insect bite! Note the flashy new red on my mask for it symbolizes the epic ‘fiyah’ now residing within my being! How else would I be able to enjoy such microwaveable treats as the delicious chimichanga when there is not a single electrical outlet in sight?!”
*The camera suddenly turns to the left revealing an electrical outlet in a nearby wall. The camera turns back to Ultimo Doom, who is now frowning*
Ultimo Doom
“When there is not a single microwave in sight!”
*The camera goes to turn, but Ultimo Doom moves into the shot*
Ultimo Doom
“Enough of that!”
*Ultimo Doom takes yet another bite of the chimichanga*
Ultimo Doom
“Sure, it sucks having to climb back up the ladder, but now I’m more motivated than E-VER and rest assured I’ll be getting back on track on the road to the SWA Extreme Combat Championship! To further demonstrate my readiness to move on from the loss, how about I give Sedition’s own Gladiator a call?”
*Ultimo Doom pulls out a silver cell phone dials a number before putting the phone on speaker. A few rings can be heard before a grumpy voice answers on the other line*
Gladiator
“Hello?”
Ultimo Doom
"Hey hey hey! Ultimo Doom here…big fan… anyway listen, I just want to thank you for putting me in a Fatal Four Way so I can kick four times the ass and get back in the hunt for the Extreme Combat Championship four times as quickly…because that’s my match this Sunday…a Fatal Four Way…kthxbai!”
Gladiator
“Fatal Four Way? Son, I’ll have whatever your on!”
*Ultimo Doom looks down for a moment and rubs his chin*
Ultimo Doom
“To be honest, this ring kinda sucks. However, I do know a guy, who knows a guy, who knows a girl, who slept with this guy, who got an STD from-”
Gladiator
“The hell are you babbling about?!”
Ultimo Doom
“Uh ex-squeeze-me, I’m trying to get you a wrestling ring at a serious price!”
Gladiator
“You’re not in a Fatal Four Way! It’s a tag team match you freakin’ moron!”
Ultimo Doom
“Saaaaaaaaaay Whaaaaaaaat?”
Gladiator
“You. Ultimo Dumbass. And Bill Dumbass. Versus two other dumbasses. You got it?”
Ultimo Doom
“Hell to the no! I’ve got a bad experience with Bills preferably of the Buffalo kind, who put me down into holes, and would lower baskets of lotion and the occasional funny papers of the Sunday newspaper, which weren't funny at all because you’re in a frackin’ hole with well moisturized hands!”
*The other line goes dead and Ultimo Doom ends the call with a resounding sigh*
Ultimo Doom
“A tag team match with a Bill? Do I sense…yes…Bill & Ultimo Doom’s Excellent Adventure!”
*The scene re-opens in the same gym moments later with Bill Dumas arriving with a gym bag over his shoulder. Ultimo Doom’s new tag team partner is dressed in a gray tank top, black track pants, and a pair of black shades. Ultimo Doom looks his partner over and then looks at himself*
Ultimo Doom
“Dude, we’re twinkies!”
Bill Dumas
“Are you kidding me?”
Ultimo Doom
“Oh, wait! Give me a second!”
*Ultimo Doom reaches into his back pocket and pulls out the exact same pair of sunglasses. He puts them on and lets out a whistle*
Ultimo Doom
“This is a good sign.”
Bill Dumas
“Whatever. Are we training or not?”
*Ultimo takes off the sunglasses and throws them across the room. He then begins to pace about the room while rubbing his chin*
Ultimo Doom
“I usually warm up with 100 laps around the ring and since you just got here…”
Bill Dumas
“It’s unorthodox, but I can do it. What was your time?”
Ultimo Doom
“I never time myself, it psyches me out. Do I speed up? Do I slow down? WHAT DO I DO?! Anywho…you get going with that and I’ll be in the weight room rocking the bench press.”
*The scene cuts to Ultimo Doom standing in a hallway next to a water fountain*
Ultimo Doom
“My thoughts on Bill Dumas? He’s green to the SWA way of doing things, but do you know who else happened to be green? The Incredible Hulk, and if my partner turns out to be like him then we’re good to go. Name a better way to show Bill just how crazy SWA is than by teaming him up with the craziest dog in the yard. You just can’t because there isn’t a better way! Do think you Millhouse Stiletto is learning anything from Branden Harvey? Nope! They’re not training together, we are and so we’ve got the advantage of already working as a team.”
*The sound of approaching footsteps can be heard and Ultimo Doom turns around and uses the water fountain to splash water on his chest. Bill Dumas enters the shot with sweat running down the side of his face trying to catch his breath*
Ultimo Doom
“All done?”
Bill Dumas
“All done. How did the bench press go?”
Ultimo Doom
“Like I was just standing here not doing a thing. Why don’t you get a drink and then it’s time for part two of your Ultimo Training.”
*Ultimo Doom pats Bill on the back and starts off down the hallway towards the ring. The cameraman and Bill soon follow behind him and now they are where they started standing outside the ring*
Ultimo Doom
“Part 2 of Ultimo Flawless Victory Training. Give me 100 laps inside the ring. Kthxbai!”
*Ultimo Doom starts off walking in the direction he came from, but Bill puts a hand on his shoulder and moves him back*
Bill Dumas
“You have no idea what you’re doing do you? All this running is just a waste. A big dumb joke!”
Ultimo Doom
“Easy with the ‘Nam flashbacks buddy boy! I DO know what I’m doing! I beat Branden Harvey in my debut match. I beat SWA’s champions in wouldn’t you know it…a tag team match! What can you say you’ve done here?”
Bill Dumas
“Then why the hell are you just having me run around?!”
Ultimo Doom
“Agility, cardio, ring awareness! SWA isn’t the WWE! You may have a tag team match on paper….and then fans rush the ring and someone starts a fire! Now, you’ve got to dodge fans, dodge flames, and somehow beat your opponent all in one match! It happened to me and it could happen to you…I-I just want to make sure that you don’t end up like I did is that so much to ask? Is it Bill?!”
*Ultimo Doom stares down his partner, who avoids his pouty stare for a moment and then looks at him with a sigh*
Bill Dumas
“I guess not…”
Ultimo Doom
“See? Just follow these teachings my padawan leaner and we’ve got this in the bag. By the time you finish those 100 laps in the ring, you’ll know it like the back of your hand. Branden Harvey could pull your eyes out with his tiny girl hands, and you could still kick his ass or tag out to me because you would know exactly where you were, right?”
Bill Dumas
“Right. He’s a pipsqueak and you kicked ass, but what about the other guy?”
Ultimo Doom
“This training program was design specifically to take this tag team down. I’m already as agile as a cat with greased whiskers. I’m the fastest man in this match, which is why I’m making you faster. How fast do you think that Millhouse guy is?”
Bill Dumas
“He’s probably not that fast.”
Ultimo Doom
“Bingo dingo! If it goes to the outside, you can lure him around the ring and then…”
*Ultimo Doom suddenly runs under the ring sliding beneath the ring apron. He then reappears on the other side and strikes a pose*
Ultimo Doom
“Ta da! Since he lacks speed, he’ll be fumbling under the ring like a teenager scrambling in a sad attempt to reach 2nd base with the a girl he “like” likes! Meanwhile, you can prepare yourself and when he sticks that big dome out of the apron, BOOM! Drop him with a punt and get back in the ring!”
Bill Dumas
“Now you’re talking.”
*Ultimo Doom then slides underneath the apron once more and shoots out the other side now standing next to Bill and facing the cameraman. He glares into the camera motioning for Bill to do the same. Now both men glare into the camera*
Ultimo Doom
“Last Chance Harvey and Steely Mill, if I were either one of you I’d be so impressed right now.”
Bill Dumas
“Shell-shocked.”
Ultimo Doom
“Shenanigans. Branden, you’re at the airport talking to yourself about how you’re gunning for me? You’ve got a better chance of joining the mile high club with a toilet than beating me in a SWA ring! This is your last chance against Ultimo Doom…Last Chance Harvey and unfortunately for you…it will be a fail.”
Bill Dumas
“An epic fail.”
Ultimo Doom
“An epic fail! Which leaves…Emilio Milhoustien III. I’m not quite sure what you said, but from what I did gather…you were either auditioning for ‘Get Him To The Greek 2’ or ‘The Great Khali Goes To London!’ You may act like a warrior, but Bill and I are warriors! He’s a former marine and I’m a Mask For Hire, our combined efforts are so mighty, you’ll be running like Frankenstein from a torch!”
*Ultimo Doom puts his arms out in front of him and begins to groan loudly while marching about*
Bill Dumas
“And we’re bringing the fire!”
Ultimo Doom
“YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAH! I have the ‘fiyah’ and if you boys aren’t careful I will literally set you ablaze and then let this guy punt you into the cheap seats like a rising phoenix! Either way, you two are out classed, out matched-”
Bill Dumas
“Out gunned.”
Ultimo Doom
“And…out-masked!”
Bill Dumas
“Wait, out-masked?”
Ultimo Doom
“I’ll get you one. Don’t worry about it. Now we’ve got some training continue!”
*Ultimo Doom motions for Bill to get in the ring as the camera fades to black*
End Scene.
October 1, 2010
5:30 p.m.
*The scene opens in a wrestling ring within a large gym. As if on cue, a man wearing a black zip-up hoodie and black track pants with a white stripe down the side sprints over to the ropes and bounces back and fourth across the ring. He then comes to a stop in the middle of the ring and begins to shadowbox*
?-?-?
“Oh yeah! Feel the burn baby! You know what I’m sayin’ man? Do you know…what I’m saying?”
*The man stops shadowboxing and motions the cameraman forward as the hood still conceals his identity*
?-?-?
"Get a little closer.”
*The cameraman moves forward until he collides with the man, who now stumbles back mumbling bleeped out obscenities*
?-?-?
“What the hell man?! For pete’s sake…”
*The man moves back to his position in the middle of the ring and pulls his hood down revealing himself to be Ultimo Doom with a super rad awesome new red and black mask. He then reaches down to the canvas and picks up a fresh chimichanga*
Ultimo Doom
“Look at this dude! I LOVE chimichangas!”
*Ultimo Doom pulls up his mask with his free hand and takes a bite out of the chimichanga*
Ultimo Doom
“So…right off the bat, yes I did lose to PsyDrag, but the last thing I want to do is act like a big ole crybaby about it. Probably because I’ve already acted like a big ole crybaby about it.”
*Ultimo Doom erupts into loud obnoxious laughter and begins to march about the ring holding his belly. He then stops in the middle of the ring and takes another bite of the chimichanga*
Ultimo Doom
“Psycho Dragon is the SWA Sensation and even I couldn’t stop his rise. He was more motivated and more driven than I was, but I’ve learned from that. You could even say that I have evolved. Oh yes, taking a Shoryuken from PsyDrag and becoming a flaming marshmallow was Ultimo Doom’s radioactive insect bite! Note the flashy new red on my mask for it symbolizes the epic ‘fiyah’ now residing within my being! How else would I be able to enjoy such microwaveable treats as the delicious chimichanga when there is not a single electrical outlet in sight?!”
*The camera suddenly turns to the left revealing an electrical outlet in a nearby wall. The camera turns back to Ultimo Doom, who is now frowning*
Ultimo Doom
“When there is not a single microwave in sight!”
*The camera goes to turn, but Ultimo Doom moves into the shot*
Ultimo Doom
“Enough of that!”
*Ultimo Doom takes yet another bite of the chimichanga*
Ultimo Doom
“Sure, it sucks having to climb back up the ladder, but now I’m more motivated than E-VER and rest assured I’ll be getting back on track on the road to the SWA Extreme Combat Championship! To further demonstrate my readiness to move on from the loss, how about I give Sedition’s own Gladiator a call?”
*Ultimo Doom pulls out a silver cell phone dials a number before putting the phone on speaker. A few rings can be heard before a grumpy voice answers on the other line*
Gladiator
“Hello?”
Ultimo Doom
"Hey hey hey! Ultimo Doom here…big fan… anyway listen, I just want to thank you for putting me in a Fatal Four Way so I can kick four times the ass and get back in the hunt for the Extreme Combat Championship four times as quickly…because that’s my match this Sunday…a Fatal Four Way…kthxbai!”
Gladiator
“Fatal Four Way? Son, I’ll have whatever your on!”
*Ultimo Doom looks down for a moment and rubs his chin*
Ultimo Doom
“To be honest, this ring kinda sucks. However, I do know a guy, who knows a guy, who knows a girl, who slept with this guy, who got an STD from-”
Gladiator
“The hell are you babbling about?!”
Ultimo Doom
“Uh ex-squeeze-me, I’m trying to get you a wrestling ring at a serious price!”
Gladiator
“You’re not in a Fatal Four Way! It’s a tag team match you freakin’ moron!”
Ultimo Doom
“Saaaaaaaaaay Whaaaaaaaat?”
Gladiator
“You. Ultimo Dumbass. And Bill Dumbass. Versus two other dumbasses. You got it?”
Ultimo Doom
“Hell to the no! I’ve got a bad experience with Bills preferably of the Buffalo kind, who put me down into holes, and would lower baskets of lotion and the occasional funny papers of the Sunday newspaper, which weren't funny at all because you’re in a frackin’ hole with well moisturized hands!”
*The other line goes dead and Ultimo Doom ends the call with a resounding sigh*
Ultimo Doom
“A tag team match with a Bill? Do I sense…yes…Bill & Ultimo Doom’s Excellent Adventure!”
*The scene re-opens in the same gym moments later with Bill Dumas arriving with a gym bag over his shoulder. Ultimo Doom’s new tag team partner is dressed in a gray tank top, black track pants, and a pair of black shades. Ultimo Doom looks his partner over and then looks at himself*
Ultimo Doom
“Dude, we’re twinkies!”
Bill Dumas
“Are you kidding me?”
Ultimo Doom
“Oh, wait! Give me a second!”
*Ultimo Doom reaches into his back pocket and pulls out the exact same pair of sunglasses. He puts them on and lets out a whistle*
Ultimo Doom
“This is a good sign.”
Bill Dumas
“Whatever. Are we training or not?”
*Ultimo takes off the sunglasses and throws them across the room. He then begins to pace about the room while rubbing his chin*
Ultimo Doom
“I usually warm up with 100 laps around the ring and since you just got here…”
Bill Dumas
“It’s unorthodox, but I can do it. What was your time?”
Ultimo Doom
“I never time myself, it psyches me out. Do I speed up? Do I slow down? WHAT DO I DO?! Anywho…you get going with that and I’ll be in the weight room rocking the bench press.”
*The scene cuts to Ultimo Doom standing in a hallway next to a water fountain*
Ultimo Doom
“My thoughts on Bill Dumas? He’s green to the SWA way of doing things, but do you know who else happened to be green? The Incredible Hulk, and if my partner turns out to be like him then we’re good to go. Name a better way to show Bill just how crazy SWA is than by teaming him up with the craziest dog in the yard. You just can’t because there isn’t a better way! Do think you Millhouse Stiletto is learning anything from Branden Harvey? Nope! They’re not training together, we are and so we’ve got the advantage of already working as a team.”
*The sound of approaching footsteps can be heard and Ultimo Doom turns around and uses the water fountain to splash water on his chest. Bill Dumas enters the shot with sweat running down the side of his face trying to catch his breath*
Ultimo Doom
“All done?”
Bill Dumas
“All done. How did the bench press go?”
Ultimo Doom
“Like I was just standing here not doing a thing. Why don’t you get a drink and then it’s time for part two of your Ultimo Training.”
*Ultimo Doom pats Bill on the back and starts off down the hallway towards the ring. The cameraman and Bill soon follow behind him and now they are where they started standing outside the ring*
Ultimo Doom
“Part 2 of Ultimo Flawless Victory Training. Give me 100 laps inside the ring. Kthxbai!”
*Ultimo Doom starts off walking in the direction he came from, but Bill puts a hand on his shoulder and moves him back*
Bill Dumas
“You have no idea what you’re doing do you? All this running is just a waste. A big dumb joke!”
Ultimo Doom
“Easy with the ‘Nam flashbacks buddy boy! I DO know what I’m doing! I beat Branden Harvey in my debut match. I beat SWA’s champions in wouldn’t you know it…a tag team match! What can you say you’ve done here?”
Bill Dumas
“Then why the hell are you just having me run around?!”
Ultimo Doom
“Agility, cardio, ring awareness! SWA isn’t the WWE! You may have a tag team match on paper….and then fans rush the ring and someone starts a fire! Now, you’ve got to dodge fans, dodge flames, and somehow beat your opponent all in one match! It happened to me and it could happen to you…I-I just want to make sure that you don’t end up like I did is that so much to ask? Is it Bill?!”
*Ultimo Doom stares down his partner, who avoids his pouty stare for a moment and then looks at him with a sigh*
Bill Dumas
“I guess not…”
Ultimo Doom
“See? Just follow these teachings my padawan leaner and we’ve got this in the bag. By the time you finish those 100 laps in the ring, you’ll know it like the back of your hand. Branden Harvey could pull your eyes out with his tiny girl hands, and you could still kick his ass or tag out to me because you would know exactly where you were, right?”
Bill Dumas
“Right. He’s a pipsqueak and you kicked ass, but what about the other guy?”
Ultimo Doom
“This training program was design specifically to take this tag team down. I’m already as agile as a cat with greased whiskers. I’m the fastest man in this match, which is why I’m making you faster. How fast do you think that Millhouse guy is?”
Bill Dumas
“He’s probably not that fast.”
Ultimo Doom
“Bingo dingo! If it goes to the outside, you can lure him around the ring and then…”
*Ultimo Doom suddenly runs under the ring sliding beneath the ring apron. He then reappears on the other side and strikes a pose*
Ultimo Doom
“Ta da! Since he lacks speed, he’ll be fumbling under the ring like a teenager scrambling in a sad attempt to reach 2nd base with the a girl he “like” likes! Meanwhile, you can prepare yourself and when he sticks that big dome out of the apron, BOOM! Drop him with a punt and get back in the ring!”
Bill Dumas
“Now you’re talking.”
*Ultimo Doom then slides underneath the apron once more and shoots out the other side now standing next to Bill and facing the cameraman. He glares into the camera motioning for Bill to do the same. Now both men glare into the camera*
Ultimo Doom
“Last Chance Harvey and Steely Mill, if I were either one of you I’d be so impressed right now.”
Bill Dumas
“Shell-shocked.”
Ultimo Doom
“Shenanigans. Branden, you’re at the airport talking to yourself about how you’re gunning for me? You’ve got a better chance of joining the mile high club with a toilet than beating me in a SWA ring! This is your last chance against Ultimo Doom…Last Chance Harvey and unfortunately for you…it will be a fail.”
Bill Dumas
“An epic fail.”
Ultimo Doom
“An epic fail! Which leaves…Emilio Milhoustien III. I’m not quite sure what you said, but from what I did gather…you were either auditioning for ‘Get Him To The Greek 2’ or ‘The Great Khali Goes To London!’ You may act like a warrior, but Bill and I are warriors! He’s a former marine and I’m a Mask For Hire, our combined efforts are so mighty, you’ll be running like Frankenstein from a torch!”
*Ultimo Doom puts his arms out in front of him and begins to groan loudly while marching about*
Bill Dumas
“And we’re bringing the fire!”
Ultimo Doom
“YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAH! I have the ‘fiyah’ and if you boys aren’t careful I will literally set you ablaze and then let this guy punt you into the cheap seats like a rising phoenix! Either way, you two are out classed, out matched-”
Bill Dumas
“Out gunned.”
Ultimo Doom
“And…out-masked!”
Bill Dumas
“Wait, out-masked?”
Ultimo Doom
“I’ll get you one. Don’t worry about it. Now we’ve got some training continue!”
*Ultimo Doom motions for Bill to get in the ring as the camera fades to black*
End Scene.