Post by Prodigy on Sept 19, 2010 19:47:55 GMT -6
Indianapolis, Indiana
September 18th, 2010
6:15 p.m.
*The scene opens to the sound of overly cheesy pirate music as Masks For Hire can be seen sitting in front of a crudely drawn pirate ship with a crew of topless mermaids. The two are dressed in full pirate garb…perhaps a little too full as Psycho Dragon has a black eye patch over both eyes and Ultimo Doom has two hooks for his hands. Both men wear the same enormous black pirate hat with a skull and crossbones and have a multicolored fake parrot on both shoulders*
Psycho Dragon
“ARRRRRRRR!”
Ultimo Doom
“ARRRRRRRRR!”
Psycho Dragon
“So speak like a scurvy pirate day be to'morrow, but Masks Fer Hire be goin' to be too busy to celebrate it what wit' our match 'n all! So we're celebratin' it early!”
Ultimo Doom
“Ye'd be surprised at how much scurvy pirate swag 100,000 bootleg booty can buy! We did spend most 'o th' doubloons on nude lasses 'n lap dances! Th' poor girls can't spy wit' ye eye in th' dark so jolly to make out ole George's face, If ye be knowin' what I be sayin'!”
Psycho Dragon
“Jim laddie, did we beat them goofs Ian DeLochNessLoser 'n Teeny Tiny Crabcakes Johnny! I reckon they be drinkin' 'n holdin' each other tryin' to forget th' ass whippin' 'n th' complete embarrassin' we gave 'em! Bin mopin' th' SWA roster 'n now bin got to sword fight me bucko, Ultimo Doom. Well, it dont matter who wins because Masks Fer Hire be not goin' anywhere 'n win, lose, or draw, we'll have a jolly showdown! Right bucko?”
Ultimo Doom
“Aye matey!”
Psycho Dragon
“I be goin' now to get ready fer th' ship!”
*Psycho Dragon stands up from his chair and removes his eye patches so he can see where he is going. He then walks out the door shutting it behind him as Ultimo Doom waves one of his hooks at him. After a brief moment of silence, Ultimo Doom looks over at the camera and lets out a sigh*
Ultimo Doom
“It’s a big match indeed. Not like Psy Drag and I don’t compete against each other in video games, bumper cars, or for the last fruit roll-up, but with this match there is so much at stake and both of us want the prize. There can only be one victor though. Granted, I know we’re both going to go out there and steal the show as usual, but something about facing off with so much at stake. I can’t help, but feel a tension between us. Like Psy Drag’s thinking of a master plan to thwart my pursuit of glory right at this moment…”
*Ultimo Doom turns his head slowly to the closed door and then begins to whisper*
Ultimo Doom
“Like he’s listening to every word I’m saying…like he’s outside that door right now with a notepad doodling me with a thought bubble that reads: “Wow, I totally suck.” And in the drawing, I’m morbidly skinny…and I have a shirt that says ‘I’m With Stupid’ and the arrow is pointing up at me because he’s portraying me as stupid…and my mask is on backwards further illustrating how stupid he thinks I am… right now…because he’s outside the fracking door…AT THIS MOMENT!”
*Ultimo Doom stands up and runs over to the door*
Ultimo Doom
“I CAN HEAR YOU!”
*Ultimo Doom frantically tries to open the door, but with his two hooks it appears as if he is rubbing two sticks together*
Ultimo Doom
“What kind of friend shuts the door when his pal has hooks for hands?! You’re leaving me in here so I can’t make it to the match aren’t you?! What kind of sick mind would do such a thing?! I was just going to tie your shoe laces together and sprint out the door giggling like a schoolgirl who’s too overly proportioned for her young age, but was created by a Japanese artist so technically that’s like a free pass to be drawn with an hourglass figure at such an assumed young age! I thought we could be above this bro…”
*Ultimo Doom leans his head against the door and makes weeping noises. As he looks at the floor, several picnic ants march under the door single file and enter the room. Ultimo Doom watches in horror as more and more picnic ants file into the room*
Ultimo Doom
“What curse have you brought upon our home Psycho Dragon?! All for your own selfish gain, you foul serpent! Enticing ants to do your bidding, you truly are pulling out all the stops…but you forgot one thing…the window!”
*Ultimo Doom runs over to the other side of the room and moves over towards the window. He goes to lift the window open with his hooks, but several pigeons are perched on the fire escape just a few feet away*
Ultimo Doom
“Pigeons too?!”
*The pigeons watch him with their heads tilted to the side as he shakes his head and moves back away from the window. He then turns his attention to the camera and sits down in the chair he used earlier*
Ultimo Doom
“The greatest friendship since Cable & Deadpool ruined over a stinking title shot. Psycho Dragon has betrayed me and sentenced me to death by a swarm of picnic ants and pigeons. I suppose I should be happy to have such an epic death, but such a feeling is impossible right now. This is…so not cool.”
*Suddenly, the door opens and Psycho Dragon strolls into the room with two cans of soda. Ultimo Doom’s head turns quickly in his direction shocked…stunned…bewildered*
Ultimo Doom
“Uh…what the hell bro?”
Psycho Dragon
"I thought you might be thirsty. Listen about the match, I’m just busting your chops. I couldn’t be happier that I’m facing you because we rock more than anyone else in the SWA and we’re still going to be best pals regardless of the outcome.”
*Ultimo Doom gasps like a small child and Psycho Dragon sits down in the chair next to him*
Ultimo Doom
“You mean it?”
Psycho Dragon
“I sure do.”
*Ultimo Doom removes his hooks and holds them out to Psy Drag*
Ultimo Doom
“We do rock more than anyone else in the SWA.”
*Psycho Dragon sits the sodas down and takes the hooks from Ultimo Doom. He then slides them on his hands as Ultimo Doom picks up a can of soda and stands up from his chair*
Psycho Dragon
“Thanks bro.”
Ultimo Doom
“Hey, what are friends for?”
*Ultimo Doom gives a wave and walks towards the door, gripping the handle and closing the door behind him. Once outside, he pauses and lets out a sigh of relief now knowing that everything will be fine with The Masks For Hire no matter the outcome of tomorrow night’s main event match*
Psycho Dragon
“PICNIC ANTS!”
*The sound of Psy Drag running over to the door can be heard followed by the scratching of the hooks on the door handle. Ultimo Doom reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a notepad and a pencil. As he leans against the door and slumps down to the floor, more running can be heard from within the room*
Psycho Dragon
“PIGEONS!”
*Ultimo Doom opens the notepad to a doodle of Psycho Dragon with a thought bubble that reads: “Wow, I totally suck.” The doodle wears a shirt that says ‘I’m with stupid’ with the arrow pointing up at Psycho Dragon*
End Scene.
September 18th, 2010
6:15 p.m.
*The scene opens to the sound of overly cheesy pirate music as Masks For Hire can be seen sitting in front of a crudely drawn pirate ship with a crew of topless mermaids. The two are dressed in full pirate garb…perhaps a little too full as Psycho Dragon has a black eye patch over both eyes and Ultimo Doom has two hooks for his hands. Both men wear the same enormous black pirate hat with a skull and crossbones and have a multicolored fake parrot on both shoulders*
Psycho Dragon
“ARRRRRRRR!”
Ultimo Doom
“ARRRRRRRRR!”
Psycho Dragon
“So speak like a scurvy pirate day be to'morrow, but Masks Fer Hire be goin' to be too busy to celebrate it what wit' our match 'n all! So we're celebratin' it early!”
Ultimo Doom
“Ye'd be surprised at how much scurvy pirate swag 100,000 bootleg booty can buy! We did spend most 'o th' doubloons on nude lasses 'n lap dances! Th' poor girls can't spy wit' ye eye in th' dark so jolly to make out ole George's face, If ye be knowin' what I be sayin'!”
Psycho Dragon
“Jim laddie, did we beat them goofs Ian DeLochNessLoser 'n Teeny Tiny Crabcakes Johnny! I reckon they be drinkin' 'n holdin' each other tryin' to forget th' ass whippin' 'n th' complete embarrassin' we gave 'em! Bin mopin' th' SWA roster 'n now bin got to sword fight me bucko, Ultimo Doom. Well, it dont matter who wins because Masks Fer Hire be not goin' anywhere 'n win, lose, or draw, we'll have a jolly showdown! Right bucko?”
Ultimo Doom
“Aye matey!”
Psycho Dragon
“I be goin' now to get ready fer th' ship!”
*Psycho Dragon stands up from his chair and removes his eye patches so he can see where he is going. He then walks out the door shutting it behind him as Ultimo Doom waves one of his hooks at him. After a brief moment of silence, Ultimo Doom looks over at the camera and lets out a sigh*
Ultimo Doom
“It’s a big match indeed. Not like Psy Drag and I don’t compete against each other in video games, bumper cars, or for the last fruit roll-up, but with this match there is so much at stake and both of us want the prize. There can only be one victor though. Granted, I know we’re both going to go out there and steal the show as usual, but something about facing off with so much at stake. I can’t help, but feel a tension between us. Like Psy Drag’s thinking of a master plan to thwart my pursuit of glory right at this moment…”
*Ultimo Doom turns his head slowly to the closed door and then begins to whisper*
Ultimo Doom
“Like he’s listening to every word I’m saying…like he’s outside that door right now with a notepad doodling me with a thought bubble that reads: “Wow, I totally suck.” And in the drawing, I’m morbidly skinny…and I have a shirt that says ‘I’m With Stupid’ and the arrow is pointing up at me because he’s portraying me as stupid…and my mask is on backwards further illustrating how stupid he thinks I am… right now…because he’s outside the fracking door…AT THIS MOMENT!”
*Ultimo Doom stands up and runs over to the door*
Ultimo Doom
“I CAN HEAR YOU!”
*Ultimo Doom frantically tries to open the door, but with his two hooks it appears as if he is rubbing two sticks together*
Ultimo Doom
“What kind of friend shuts the door when his pal has hooks for hands?! You’re leaving me in here so I can’t make it to the match aren’t you?! What kind of sick mind would do such a thing?! I was just going to tie your shoe laces together and sprint out the door giggling like a schoolgirl who’s too overly proportioned for her young age, but was created by a Japanese artist so technically that’s like a free pass to be drawn with an hourglass figure at such an assumed young age! I thought we could be above this bro…”
*Ultimo Doom leans his head against the door and makes weeping noises. As he looks at the floor, several picnic ants march under the door single file and enter the room. Ultimo Doom watches in horror as more and more picnic ants file into the room*
Ultimo Doom
“What curse have you brought upon our home Psycho Dragon?! All for your own selfish gain, you foul serpent! Enticing ants to do your bidding, you truly are pulling out all the stops…but you forgot one thing…the window!”
*Ultimo Doom runs over to the other side of the room and moves over towards the window. He goes to lift the window open with his hooks, but several pigeons are perched on the fire escape just a few feet away*
Ultimo Doom
“Pigeons too?!”
*The pigeons watch him with their heads tilted to the side as he shakes his head and moves back away from the window. He then turns his attention to the camera and sits down in the chair he used earlier*
Ultimo Doom
“The greatest friendship since Cable & Deadpool ruined over a stinking title shot. Psycho Dragon has betrayed me and sentenced me to death by a swarm of picnic ants and pigeons. I suppose I should be happy to have such an epic death, but such a feeling is impossible right now. This is…so not cool.”
*Suddenly, the door opens and Psycho Dragon strolls into the room with two cans of soda. Ultimo Doom’s head turns quickly in his direction shocked…stunned…bewildered*
Ultimo Doom
“Uh…what the hell bro?”
Psycho Dragon
"I thought you might be thirsty. Listen about the match, I’m just busting your chops. I couldn’t be happier that I’m facing you because we rock more than anyone else in the SWA and we’re still going to be best pals regardless of the outcome.”
*Ultimo Doom gasps like a small child and Psycho Dragon sits down in the chair next to him*
Ultimo Doom
“You mean it?”
Psycho Dragon
“I sure do.”
*Ultimo Doom removes his hooks and holds them out to Psy Drag*
Ultimo Doom
“We do rock more than anyone else in the SWA.”
*Psycho Dragon sits the sodas down and takes the hooks from Ultimo Doom. He then slides them on his hands as Ultimo Doom picks up a can of soda and stands up from his chair*
Psycho Dragon
“Thanks bro.”
Ultimo Doom
“Hey, what are friends for?”
*Ultimo Doom gives a wave and walks towards the door, gripping the handle and closing the door behind him. Once outside, he pauses and lets out a sigh of relief now knowing that everything will be fine with The Masks For Hire no matter the outcome of tomorrow night’s main event match*
Psycho Dragon
“PICNIC ANTS!”
*The sound of Psy Drag running over to the door can be heard followed by the scratching of the hooks on the door handle. Ultimo Doom reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a notepad and a pencil. As he leans against the door and slumps down to the floor, more running can be heard from within the room*
Psycho Dragon
“PIGEONS!”
*Ultimo Doom opens the notepad to a doodle of Psycho Dragon with a thought bubble that reads: “Wow, I totally suck.” The doodle wears a shirt that says ‘I’m with stupid’ with the arrow pointing up at Psycho Dragon*
End Scene.