SNF: Spokane (4/17/10)

[Sedition: The Rev]

Saturday Night Fever comes on the air. Rulers, and overlords of the Sedition Wrestling Alliance, The Rev and Gladiator are sitting at a news desk. A cheesy news music plays, actually it’s just Gladiator humming a cheesy news music, but darn it, the music sounds great. The music (Gladiator’s humming) fades out.

THE REV: Welcome to tonight’s edition of Saturday Night Fever, and welcome to a very special edition of the Sedition Edition.

GLADIATOR: This just in, The Sedition are amazing.

THE REV: Correct you are my friend. Amazing we are. And to prove our amazingness…

GLADIATOR: Wait, is amazingness a real word?

THE REV: I don’t know. Maybe we should check the dictionary. I don’t want to come off looking like an idiot. Say, Mr. Cameraman, can you pause the camera while we go check the dictionary.

CAMERAMAN: Actually we’re on live.

THE REV: Live eh? Could you possibly edit out the last few sentences so we don’t look stupid on live TV.

CAMERAMAN: That’s impossible. You can’t edit live TV.

Gladiator pulls out a handgun and points it at the cameraman.

GLADIATOR: Do as the man says!

CAMERAMAN: Uhhh… ok… consider it edited.

THE REV: Great. So I’ll pick up from the part where Gladiator said we were amazing. In 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... Correct you are my friend. Amazing we are. And to prove our amazingness, we will be entering the word amazingness into Webster’s database, and we will be crowning a new SWA Champion at Spring Breakdown. Here with more information on this is our amazingness correspondent Gladiator.

GLADIATOR: Thank you Rev, and it is true. A new SWA Champion will be crowned at Spring Breakdown. But, that’s not all. The champion will be crowned in an open tournament, where any member of the SWA roster is welcome to compete. Whether it be our good friends Kid Cannabis, or Gabreal Martin, or our sworn enemies Bryce Bridges, or Mr. Kiljoy, everyone will have a fair shot at the SWA Championship.

THE REV: And by fair we mean horribly lopsided in the favor of Kid Cannabis and Gabreal Martin.

GLADIATOR: You know it.

THE REV: So there you have it fans. On Sunday May 2nd history will be made at Spring Breakdown as we crown Kid Cannabis, or Gabreal Martin as SWA Champion.

GLADIATOR: Or, one of those other guys.

THE REV: Fat chance!

GLADIATOR: Fat like Rosie O’Donnell.

THE REV: So enjoy the show tonight, and be sure to order Spring breakdown. For every dollar we make off the buy rates we promise to pledge 0% to charity. So please give back wrestling fans.

Gladiator once again hums the most amazingest cheesy news music ever as the camera fades out.



_________________________

PRESENTS



Live from
SPOKANE, WASHINGTON, USA



_________________________

**The fans are on their feet chanting “SWA! SWA! SWA! SWA!” As the SWA logo flashes on the JumboTron, and pyrotechnics shoot off above the ring, many aggressive and slightly drunken fans push each other around to get their faces on camera. Joe Aillo sits shackled to his chair with Skippy Mohophosite at his left.**

JOE: What an announcement. We are now only 2 weeks away from Spring Breakdown. Skippy, with this tournament being open to just about anyone, who has the odds in their favor?

SKIPPY: Probably Gabreal Martin and Kid Cannabis.

JOE: Are you programmed to automatically respond with Sedition propaganda each time you're asked a question?

SKIPPY: I just recognize talent when I see it. Gabreal Marlowe and Kid Canvas have impressed me.

JOE: Which is why you just got their names wrong.

**Skippy pauses to think.**

SKIPPY: Getting names wrong is how we roll in The Sedition.

JOE: Whatever. Despite the fact that I'm forced to sit here against my will, and bound to this spot with shackles attached to my ankles, I'm actually a little excited about the show tonight. Take a look at what's scheduled.

------------------------------


MAIN EVENT
(Special Guest referee: Skippy Mohophosite)

MR. KILJOY
-vs-
KID CANNABIS



NO DQ TAG TEAM MATCH

TEEN THROB & IAN DE TORNADO
-vs-
BRYCE BRIDGES & CAPTAIN INSANITY



REGULAR MATCH

WAYLON HAWTHORNE
-vs-
DC ANTONIO



------------------------------

JOE: To make this night even better, during the main event, you won't be next to me.

SKIPPY: That's right. I'll be special guest referee.

JOE: Normally I would assume you being in a main event with Kid Cannabis would be a setup for a one sided fight. I'm actually wondering if Rev and Gladiator booked it this way because they know you'll eventually be tortured by Kiljoy and Frak.

SKIPPY: I promised them I'd be a man and cast my fear away for the sake of a good main event.

JOE: Alright then. Sure hope you're wearing some Depends. Kiljoy and Frak have it out for you. In a little while we'll also see a tag team match with 2 SWA veterans, Teen Throb and Captain Insanity, each teaming up with 2 SWA rising stars, Ian De Tornado and Bryce Bridges. It will be interesting to see if those teams can work together.

SKIPPY: First up in DC Antonio's debut against “Geriatric” Waylon Hawthorne. Youth vs Experience.

JOE: Or sanity vs Alzheimers. Lets get down to the ring for the opening bout.

DC Antonio -vs- Waylon Hawthorne

'New York' by Jay-Z blasts from the speakers above as DC Antonio emerges from backstage. The crowd boos as he makes his way down to the ring. DC is wearing some black boxing trunks, and black and red wrestling boots. He shows off his muscles, cracks his knuckles, and slides into the ring. Antonio jumps into a nearby turnbuckle and looks out to the crowd, raising both arms in the air, as the boos continue non-stop.

VIRGIL: Ladies and gentlemen, introducing for the first time to SWA audiences. He is originally from Genoa, Italy but now residing in The Big Apple! Standing 6 feet and 3 inches and weighing 242 pounds. He is pure blooded Italian, which means if he can't wrestle, I bet he can cook. Ladies and gentlemen, this is DC Antonio!

“The Last Saskatchewan Pirate” begins to play. Waylon walks out onto the stage and flexes his saggy old man muscles. Waylon walks down the aisle. About halfway to the ring he seems to forget what he’s doing. He looks around and sees the ring and suddenly remembers what he’s supposed to do. He climbs up onto the apron and steps through the ropes. He stands in the middle of the ring and does a dopey old man dance.

VIRGIL: And his opponent. From the oddly named Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan.... Seriously, is that a real city? Weird. He stands 5 feet and 10 inches tall and weighs in at 245 pounds. He's the dude that makes saggy man boobs cool. "Geriatric" Waylon Hawthorne!

The bell rings and the match is underway. Hawthorne and Antonio meet in the middle of the ring and lock up, but Antonio easily shoves Hawthorne to the ground. The crowd boos DC as he talks trash to the fallen Hawthorne. Hawthorne gets to his feet and tells him to bring it. Antonio shrugs his shoulders and moves forward. They lock up, and again Antonio shoves Hawthorne hard to the canvas.

Hawthorne climbs back to his feet, clearly frustrated. In a display of total disrespect, Antonio puts his hands behind his back and offers his chin to Hawthorne.

JOE: Someone's cocky.

Hawthorne is not sure if this is a trap or not. Antonio assures him that it isn’t - he’s willing to give him a free shot. Hawthorne does not look amused, but he rears his fist back, steps forward - and kicks Antonio Antonio right between the legs. Antonio drops to his knees, clutching his bruised groin. Hawthorne bounces off the ropes and dropkicks him right in the face.

SKIPPY: Ohhhhhhh. I can't bear to watch.

Hawthorne slaps Antonio in the face and returns the trash talk before stomping on his head and chest. Antonio rolls towards the rope, and the referee forces Hawthorne off of him. Antonio gets back to his feet, still sore but with a look of anger and humiliation on his face. He charges at Hawthorne, but he ducks, bounces off the ropes and comes back with a flying forearm smash that puts Antonio back down. Antonio climbs to his feet, but Hawthorne takes him down with another smash. Antonio gets back up, a little slower this time, and Hawthorne rushes him, but Antonio ducks, picks Hawthorne up and drives his to the mat with a Samoan drop. He makes a cover.

..1


...2


Hawthorne kicks out.

Antonio picks Hawthorne up and whips him into the ropes, catching him with a hip toss on the return. Hawthorne lies in obvious pain, clutching his back. Antonio picks him up delivers a back breaker.

Antonio picks Hawthorne up again and whips him into the far corner, Hawthorne hits the turnbuckles with force and drops to the canvas. Antonio taunts the crowd before walking over to Hawthorne in the corner. He pulls Hawthorne up by his hair while insulting the elderly man. Hawthorne replies with a kick to the gut followed up by an inside cradle for a cover.

..1


...2


Antonio kicks out.

JOE: That one was close.

SKIPPY: I think Hawthorne pulled his Sciatica on that one.

JOE: Do you even know what a Sciatica is?

SKIPPY: Not sure. Sounds like some kind of Barbarian tribe. "I am the Sciatican, son of Conan".

Both wrestlers get to their feet, but Hawthorne manages to land the first blow with a dropkick to the knee, then a roundhouse kick straight to Antonio’s head. Hawthorne grabs Antonio’s leg and lays it out straight before stomping right on the ankle. Antonio groans in pain and grabs his leg. Hawthorne kicks him in the head, grabs the leg again, and this time lands both feet on the ankle with a double foot stomp.

Hawthorne grabs the leg again, but Antonio pushes him away and he lands in the middle of the ring, hitting his back against the canvas. Hawthorne rubs his back as he gets to his feet, but Antonio is up too, and he drops Hawthorne with a clothesline. Antonio is limping slightly as he tries to walk off the pain in his ankle, not realising that Hawthorne is back up. Hawthorne runs forward, but Antonio sees him coming and picks him up, dropping his throat first across the top rope. Hawthorne goes down clutching his neck.

JOE: He's gonna kill the old man out there.

SKIPPY: Pfft. When has anyone ever died from losing the ability to breathe. Don't be so overly dramatic, Joe.

Antonio throws Hawthorne into the corner. Antonio backs up and charges forward for a big splash, but Hawthorne gets his feet up and nails him right between the eyes. Antonio turns around, dazed and confused, allowing Hawthorne the chance to climb onto the second turnbuckle. Hawthorne takes down Antonio with a bulldog. Hawthorne feels the impact in his back and can’t capitalise. Both men lay motionless on the mat.

The Ref starts to count.

..1


...2


....3


.....4


......5


With the help of the ring ropes, Hawthorne starts to pull himself back to his feet,but Antonio is up first. Antonio stomps on Hawthorne’s back. Antonio pulls him to his feet and nails a hard suplex. He attacks Hawthorne with stomps to the face and body. Antonio drags Hawthorne to the middle of the ring and locks on a Camel Clutch.

JOE: This is some openiong match. These guys are fighting like the Title's on the line already.

Hawthorne screams in agony. The referee asks his if he gives up, but every time he yells, “No.” Hawthorne is in the middle of the ring with no way to get to the ropes. Antonio wrenches back on the hold, and Hawthorne is fading. The referee picks up his hand. It drops. He picks it up once more, and it drops a second time. Once more he lifts up Hawthorne’s hand… and it stays up. Hawthorne slams his fist against the canvas, but Antonio keeps a firm grip on the hold. Hawthorne does the only thing he can in this situation; managing to slip his chin down, he bites hard on Antonio‘s hand.

Antonio screams in pain as Hawthorne bites down even more. He releases his grip of the hold. Hawthorne knocks him back with a shot to the face. Antonio gets back to his feet, but Hawthorne is still down in the ring. Antonio moves forward, and Hawthorne manages to kick him in the knee, leaving him to fall flat on his face. Grabbing his leg, Antonio stumbles back up and tries to rush the prone Hawthorne, but he answers with another kick, this time a swinging blow to the back of the knee that drops Antonio backwards. Raising his leg high in the air, Hawthorne brings his boot back down, landing heel first on the knee of Antonio.

SKIPPY: He's really working on that leg.

JOE: That knee won't be able to take much more abuse.

Hawthorne drags himself up to a standing position and lands three stiff kicks to the knee of Antonio before he locks in a figure four leglock. Antonio cries out in pain as Hawthorne tries to stretch his legs out straight. Antonio begins to drag himself across the ring to the ropes. Antonio’s leg is being bent out of shape as Hawthorne attempts to apply as much pressure to his ankle as possible.

The ref checks Antonio as he looks like he might quit. Antonio shakes his head in response to the referee. Antonio struggles and fights the hold. Antontio rips the pocket off the referee's shirt, causing the ref to look down in confusion. The distraction gives Antonio enough time to reach forward and poke Hawthorne in the eyes, which causes him to break the hold.

SKIPPY: Atta boy. When in doubt, poke out the eyes.

JOE: This is SWA. This place was built on cheap shots.

Both wrestlers slowly get back to their feet, Hawthorne still holding his back as Antonio limps around the ring. They meet in the middle of the ring, Antonio swinging wildly. Hawthorne ducks and answers with chops to Antonio’s chest. Antonio replies with a rake of the eyes and a back drop into a cover.

..1


...2


Hawthorne barely kicks out.

Antonio stands up and pulls Hawthorne to his feet. He lifts his up into position for the New York Necksnap, but his knee gives out from under him. Hawthorne lands on his feet and nails Antonio with a DDT and he goes for the cover.

..1


...2


Antonio barely kicks out.

JOE: I can't believe these guys are still kicking out. Where are they getting their energy from?

Both men lie on the mat, catching their breaths. Hawthorne is the first to get to his feet. He gentle stretches his back, holding it in pain. Hawthorne stomps at Antonio as he gets back to his feet. Both men lock up and Hawthorne executes a jawbreaker. Antontio staggers back a little. Hawthorne spears him into the turnbuckle where he proceeds to stomp Antonio down to the mat. Hawthorne pulls Antonio back up, leaning him against the turnbuckle. Hawthorne lays a series of chops across Antonio's chest. Antonio pushes Hawthorne back and sits himself up on the top turnbuckle. Hawthorne quickly grabs his opponent and excutes a top rope bodyslam. Hawthorne is back on his feet. Hawthorne bounces off the ropes and drops a Hogan style Atomic Leg drop across the chest of Antonio.

Hawthorne goes for the cover.

..1





...2





....3




Winner: Waylon Hawthorne

JOE: Unbelievable opening match. If either of these guys fight like that in the Spring Breakdown tournament, they'll have a fair shot at the belt.

SKIPPY: What if they fight each other again in the first round?

JOE: Uh..... then I guess one of them will have a fair shot at the belt.

SKIPPY: What if one of them fights a bear in the semi finals?

JOE: A bear? Have you ever seen a bear in an SWA match?

SKIPPY: Yes.

**Joe stops and thinks for a second.

JOE: Oh yeah. Lions and Tigers too.

SKIPPY: See. Not everything I say is stupid.

JOE: Correction. Not everything you say is a lie.

SKIPPY: Fine. If you'll excuse me for a second, there's a redhead in row 3 that keeps giving me "the look".

JOE: It's probably a lazy eye. We'll be back after this.

_________________________

[Sedition: The Rev]

(We open up backstage after the commercial to see a car pull up and out of it we see former SWA star Kryptochild come. Michael Saint is there to greet him and the two men share a handshake.)

Kryptochild: Saint man this is awesome of you. I am so glad to be having a regular wrestling job again.

Saint: Hey anything for you man. We are the best of friends and I want to make sure that you had a job back in this ring. It was the least that I could do for you after all that we have been through over the years.

Kryptochild: This is going to be great.

Saint: It is a good thing I have you around man. I am going to need someone to help me against Rev and Gladiator.

Kryptochild: I heard about that. I am more than glad to help you in any way possible my friend.

Saint: I am retired so I am not getting in that ring again. You get to be the one who does the work there. You and Bryce Bridges would be a good team. He has the same sort of issues with The Sedition that I have right now.

Kryptochild: That sounds good to me anything to keep me in the fold. This contract I got from you is great.

(Rev and Gladiator walk right up to Saint and Kryptochild. Rev snatches the contract right out of Kryptochild's hands.)

Rev: Well lookie what we have here. Has Mikey been doing some recruiting?

Gladiator: I guess we did kind of shoot ourselves in the foot on that one. Hiring you on as management and all. I'd complain, but you do contractually have the power to hire whoever you like. We did give him that power, didn't we Rev?

Rev: I suppose we did. That leaves us at a bit of a disadvantage, doesn't it? I mean Saint can just hire any of his old friends at any time. He can start building the roster against us. We're in some kind of trouble now. Well, Kryptochild. I suppose it's good to have you back. Here's your contract. Carry on.

(Kryptochild takes the contract back and starts to walk away with Saint. Rev places a hand on Kryptochild's shoulder and stops him.

Rev: Well hold on there for a minute. Something just came to me. Saint has the power to hire new employees to the SWA, but I don't remember ever giving him the authority to assign a position. Do you remember giving him that kind of autyhority?

Gladiator: As a matter of fact, I don't remember that. Hmmm. Maybe we should sit down in our thinking chair and think about who in this company does have that authority.

Rev: Golly, could it be us?

Gladiator: You know what, I think it is us. How about that? So since Saint here is lacking some authority, maybe we should just assign a position to Kryptochild so he can get right to work.

Rev: I know there's always a position open on the roster to wrestle. But you know, I think based on his qualifications, Kryptochild is much more suited for another job we have yet to fill.

Saint: Don't do this.

Gladiator: Hope you've been working out, cause you're going to get a lot of action as the new personal bodyguard to "The Chosen One" Gabreal Martin.

Rev: Good thing you've al;ready signe dthis contract. We can put you to work right away.

(Rev and Gladiator point Kryptchild forward like sheep herders. Krypto looks back at Saint in disappointment.)

Saint: I'll make this right. I promise.

__________________

JOE: Of all the no good sleazy corporate moves to make.

SKIPPY: Yes! I'm off for the hook on carrying Gabe's bags now!

JOE: What does Gabreal Martin need a bodyguard for? This is just another move to hurt Saint's position in this company, and another uncalled for punishment against anyone that stands with Saint.

SKIPPY: Better watch where you're standing, Joe.

JOE: Hey, whatever happened to the redhead who was giving you “the look”.

SKIPPY: I don't want to talk about it.

JOE: It was a lazy eye, wasn't it.

SKIPPY: I said I don't want to talk about it.

JOE: Haha! I knew it.

SKIPPY: Just get on with the show already.

JOE: Ok. I've had my fun. Management has forced some odd teams this week for what's sure to be a chaotic No DQ Tag Team Match. Filipino sensation Ian De Tornado teams with boy band superstar Teen Throb to take on extreme combat icon Captain Insanity and the underdog of SWA, Bryce Bridges. No Disqualifications. Tornado and Captain Insanity fought in a bloody contest last week, which Insanity came out of as the winner. For the record, he pinned Duke Wallace, not Tornado. Then there's Teen Throb, who has been at war with Captain Insanity forever now. Throw in Bridges who's determined to make his own success in SWA regardless of what opposition he's faced with, adn you've got one dramatic tag team match.

Teen Throb & Ian DeTornado -vs- Captain Insanity & Bryce Bridges
--

As the opening harmonies from Watch Out's song Babe You Know You Want Me begin, every man in the arena groans. The girls, at least those under the age of 30 all scream. Teen Throb's pretty ol' face flashes on the big screen and he dances down the aisle in traditional boy band fashion. Once entering the ring Teen Throb lip syncs his own lyrics and swivels his hips to please his fans.

After the into of the song, he will then come out of the smoke effects, and do the360 degrees spin with his left foot pivot before rushing/running towards the ring, then he will climb the ring post, points to the audience, spread his arms sidewards, before doing a backflip toward the center of the ring.

The lights dim a little as his starts to play. Captain Insanity steps out from behind the curtain. He pauses briefly, looking down at the ring and his opponent(s) before casually walking to the ring, never taking his eyes off his opponent(s). Insanity slides into the ring and quickly gets to his feet.

Edge of Seventeen by Jonas hits the PA system as the lights turn pink and green. Bryce walks out with his trademark zebra capone hat. He walks with a cocky undertone, getting booed every step of the way. He goes to high five a fan who trys return the favor, but before he makes contact, he quickly lows his hand, and gives the fan a pissed off look. Bryce shakes his head in a disapproving manor and moves along. Once at the apron, he takes a step back, takes off his hat, gets a running start, and slides into the ring. Once in the ring, he does the Super Crazy front flip nip-up. He does to the turnbuckle and climbs to the second rope. He makes a chicken wing with his right arm, taunting for the roaring elbow. He climbs down from the turnbuckle. The lights go back to normal and the music fades out as Bryce prepares for the upcoming match.


(The bell rings and we are underway. Teen Throb and Bryce Bridges start off the match for their respective teams. We get a lock up and Bryce with a go behind into a takedown. Bryce right away goes for The Grip of Seventeen, but right away Throb wiggles as fast as he can to get to the bottom rope to break up the hold. Bryce backs off long enough to Throb to get to his feet. When Throb is up Bryce charges and goes for a double leg takedown, but when he gets close enough Throb kicks Bryce in the top of the head. Bryce stands up with a smile on his face and slaps Throb. Throb turns around and makes a tag to Ian De Tornado. Tornado in and Bryce goes for a double leg on him, but Tornado moves out of the way. When Bryce is back to his feet Tornado with a hurricanrana. Bryce is up and Tornado with a takedown. Tornado goes for a kimura lock, but Bryce is able to get out of the hold and makes a tag to Captain Insanity. Insanity is in and hits a clothesline on Tornado. Insanity sets up for The Insanity Bomb, but Tornado reverses into a DDT. Tornado goes to the outside and gets a chair from under the ring.)

Joe: Looks like Tornado is going to be the first to push the No DQ thing.

Skippy: If he things he is going to be able to get more extreme that Insanity he is crazy.

(Tornado waits for Insanity to get to his feet before swinging for his head. Insanity ducks and when Tornado turns around Insanity punches the chair sending it back into the face of Tornado. Tornado stumbles to his feet and tags Teen Throb back into the match. Insanity grabs the chair and right away goes after Throb. Insanity is repeatedly swinging, but is unable to connect with Throb. Throb with a drop toe hold that sends the chair into the face of Insanity. Throb hits the ropes and drops a leg on the back of Insanity's head to once again send him down into the chair. Cover by Throb

1






2



kickout by Insanity. Throb drags Insanity to a corner and goes up top. Throb comes off the top with The Pretty Boy Splash, but Insanity rolls out of the way and tags in Bryce Bridges. Bryce springboards into the ring with a headbutt that connects with Throb. Cover




1








2





kickout by Throb. Bryce is stalking Throb. Throb gets to his feet and Bryce goes for A Rolling Elbow, but Throb moves out of the way and tags in Tornado. Tornado springboards into the ring and connects with a spear on Bryce! Tornado picks up Bryce and delivers a F5. Tornado hits the ropes and goes for The Tornadosault, but Bryce gets his knees up into the gut of Tornado.)

Joe: Bryce needs to make the tag.

Skippy: Get the SWA Icon in it is for the best. The kid can't handle this yet.

Joe: What are you saying Bryce is doing great out there.

Skippy: The Sedition know the truth about this that is why they are going to get rid of him.

(Bryce jumps over to his corner and makes to the tag to Captain Insanity. Insanity in and gets tackled by Tornado. Tornado stats laying in with a mounted punch. Tornado picks up Insanity and goes for another F5, but this time Insanity reverses into a neckbreaker. Insanity picks up the chair and brings it down on the back of Tornado. A second time. A third time. Tornado crawls over and when Insanity goes for a foreth chair shot he moves and makes the tag to Teen Throb. Throb springboards in and dropkicks the chair into the face of Insanity! Cover

1






2






kickout by Insanity. Throb is taunting his rival by dancing around him. Throb is playing around with the crowd and does not see Insanity to his feet with the chair in his hand. Throb turns around and gets crack right in the head with the chair! Insanity throws the bent chair out of the ring and makes a tag to Bryce Bridges before rolling out of the ring and getting a table.)

Joe: What is he doing?

Skippy: He is not the legal man in this match so he should not be doing this.

(Insanity tries to get back in the ring with the table, but the ref makes him leave and Insanity sets up the table on the outside. Bryce is in the ring and Insanity throws him a kendo stick. Bryce starts to lay into Throb heavy with the stick as the pretty boy lays on the mat bleeding. Bryce has no mercy at all as he takes on Throb. Bryce drops the kendo stick and locks Throb in The Grip of Seventeen. Bryce has the hold in tight and his not letting go. Throb is not going to get to the ropes. Tornado is back in the ring and kicks Bryce in the side of the head to break up the hold. Tornado drags his partner to their corner and tags himself back in. Tornado is in and starts to go to town on Bryce with the kendo stick. Bryce is in a lot of pain. Bryce goes for a tag, but gets whacked in the back of the head by Tornado! Cover

1





2



broken up by Insanity. Tornado drags Bryce to the center of the ring. Tornado goes for the ropes and springboards into The Tornadosault, but Bryce catches his leg and is able to get him in The Grip of Seventeen! Tornado is now in the middle of the ring a hold and is not able to break it. Throb stumbles to his feet and goes in to break the hold, but gets speared by Insanity! Insanity sets up Throb for a powerbomb over the top through the table on the outside, but instead Throb with a hurricanranna that puts Insanity through the table. Throb to his feet and is jumping around, but from behind Bryce dropkicks him out of the ring. Bryce goes to set up Tornado for The Grip of Seventeen again, but Gabreal Martin comes to ringside with a chair.

Joe: What's Gabreal doing out there? He's not part of this match!

Gabe is taunting Bryce who gets on the apron and takes a swing missing. Tornado grabs Bryce and brings him back into the ring with an F5. Gabe throws Tornado the chair and he goes up top. Tornado off the top with The Xtreme Tornadosault!

1






2







3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)


Winners: Ian De Tornado and Teen Throb

Teen Throb and Ian De Tornado celebrate in the ring, while Gabe Martin dodges garbage that fans are throwing at him as he walks backstage. Captain Insanity is just shaking his head in disappointment. Bryce is out cold. Tornado and Teen Throb hit a couple of high fives and it cuts over to a disgusted Joe Aillo.

JOE: Talk about a bogus finish. Gabreal Martin had no business being out here.

SKIPPY: No disqualifications. He had oodles of business being out there.

JOE: Oodles?

SKIPPY: And you're avoiding the more important question.

JOE: What's that?

SKIPPY: Where was that new bodyguard of his? You want to talk about boghus. I say a guy slacking off on his first day of a new job shows poor work ethic.

JOE: Oh please.

SKIPPY: Maybe if Bryce is so outraged he should have the guts to face Gabreal Martin one on one in the ring.

JOE: He did last week, and it ended in chaos too.

SKIPPY: That's SWA. We may not be fair, but at least we're consistent.

JOE: And on that note, we're headed to our last break. The main event is up next.

_______________

[Sedition: The Rev]

Gladiator is backstage surrounded by stage hands and ring crew guys.

GLADIATOR: Tonight, the great Skippy Mohophosite will be stepping into the ring as referee. This leaves a very important gap at the broadcast table. The only question is, who is man enough to fill his shoes.

A man with a mullet and neon tassels hanging from his arms leaps forward with glee.

JANNETTY: Put me in boss. I swear I won’t let you down.

GLADIATOR: Well…

JANNETTY: Great. Rock on!

Marty starts to run off.

GLADIATOR: I didn’t say yes.

JANNETTY: But, you didn’t say no either.

GLADIATOR: Drat! I hope he doesn’t screw this up.

Gladiator has a concerned look on his face as Jannetty runs off.

______________________

“Stayin’ Alive” by the Bee Gees plays throughout the arena and Special Guest Referee Skippy Mohophosite stands up from the broadcast table.

SKIPPY: That’s my cue.

Skippy drops his headset on the table. He struts around the ringside area and climbs into the ring. One in the ring he peels off his lime green suit coat and reveals the striped referee shirt. Skippy winks at the ladies and poses in the ring.

AIELLO: Well fans, clearly we are about to see a wrestling screw job Sedition style. We have no reason to believe that Skippy will be a fair referee tonight.

As Skippy struts his stuff in the ring, Marty Jannetty runs down the aisle. He sits down next to Joe and takes a seat next to Joe Aiello. He puts on Skippy’s headset.

AIELLO: Apparently I’m being joined by Marty Jannety for this match. I didn’t realize The Sedition had you on their payroll.

JANNETTY: They don’t, but that will always be the dream. Gladiator said if I can ever prove that I’m more than a comedy act to satisfy his need to laugh at washed up stars from the 80’s, he’ll start letting me ride inside the car instead of in the trunk.

AIELLO: Well, when you dream, you dream big.

Mr. Kiljoy -vs- Kid Cannabis

"War Is Necessary" by Nas booms on the P.A. The arena fills with obscenely expensive pyro and lights displays as the one and only...

Kid Cannabis! Wrestling legend and the inventor of dynamite, strolls down the enterance ramp, smoking a big fat blunt full of blueberry kush while he flips off and berates the fans.

He steps in the ring....HIS RING!.... and gets ready to whoop another jobber's ass before he goes back to his hotel room filled with Hooter's waitresses looking to get a child support check from yours truly!

Skippy tries to get a high five from Cannabis, but Cannabis just shakes his head no. Skippy backs away and claps his hands trying not to look embarrassed.

VIRGIL: Introducing First, Hailing from the great and smoky city of Amsterdam. Weighing in a 232 pounds. He is the Hottest thing smoking’ in professional wrestling today. KID CANNABIS!!!

When the theme to Silent Hill blast in the arena we then see green smoke coming from the entranceway and then we see The Massive Mr.Kiljoy comes out with a sadistic smile on his face then he is followed by his faithfull sidekick the midget clown Frak. Then they both come into the ring and Mr. Kiljoy goes to the corner and climbs it and raises both his arms in the air as Frak is running around in the ring like a rabid pitbull. Skippy hides outside the ring as Kiljoy looks out at him with murderous rage in his eyes.

VIRGIL: And his opponent. Accompanied to the ring by his trusty midget Frak. He hails from the place where they make crazy clowns. He weighs in at an amazing 320 pounds. He is the most insane clown in the world. MR. KILJOY!!!

Skippy calls for the bell from the outside. As Kiljoy is focused on Skippy, Cannabis comes from behind and starts hammering down on the 7 foot tall clown. He spins Kiljoy around and hits him with some hard knife edge chops. Cannabis whips Kiljoy to the corner. Cannabis charges after him, but Kiljoy gets his foot up and hits Cannabis with a boot to the face. Cannabis hit’s the mat. Kiljoy climbs up on the second rope and drops down on Cannabis with a Big Splash. Kiljoy goes for the cover, but Skippy still on the outside of the ring turns his back and starts whistling as though he didn’t notice. Kiljoy’s midget sidekick Frak runs around the ring and jumps on Skippy’s back. Skippy starts to reaches up and grabs Frak by the head. He flips him over and slams Frak down on the concrete. Kiljoy reaches out and grabs Skippy by the head. Cannabis comes from behind. He grabs Kiljoy by the head and drops him with a Reverse DDT. Cannabis goes for the cover. Skippy slides into the ring and gives a very fast count,

1, 2,

Kiljoy kicks out. Cannabis climbs up on the top rope as Kiljoy gets to his feet. Cannabis flies off the top rope and hits Kiljoy with a Missile Dropkick executed to perfection. He then runs towards the ropes and springboards off with a Lionsault. Cannabis again goes for the cover. Skippy gets in place with another fast count,

1, 2,

Kiljoy kicks out just in the nick of time. Cannabis picks Kiljoy up. He whips Kiljoy off the ropes. On the rebound Cannabis attempts a Hurricanranna, but Kiljoy reverses with a Sit Down Powerbomb. Kiljoy now goes for the cover. Skippy makes a very, very slow count,

1...

…

…

…

…

2...

…

…

…

Cannabis kicks out.

AIELLO: This is just ridiculous. Rev and Gladiator are being so unfair to Mr. Kiljoy, making him be in this match.

JANNETTY: I have always found The Rev and Gladiator to be fair and impartial authority figures.

AIELLO: How can you say that as we sit here and watch Mr. Kiljoy getting screwed over by The Sedition?

JANNETTY: The Rev and Gladiator are the only guys who are willing to put me on TV.

Kiljoy looks up at Skippy. He darts after him. Skippy tries to escape, but Kiljoy gets his hands on him. Kiljoy puts his hands on Skippy’s throat and lifts him up in the air. Cannabis rolls out of the ring and grabs a steel chair. Cannabis slides in and hits Kiljoy hard in the back with the chair. Kiljoy drops Skippy and clutches his back. Kiljoy turns around and Cannabis cracks him hard over the head with the chair. Kiljoy drops down to his knees. Cannabis bounces off the ropes and leaps into the air. As he drops down he hits Kiljoy hard on the head with the chair and Kiljoy drops down to the mat. Cannabis goes for the cover. Skippy again has a fast count,

1, 2,

Frak flies off the top rope and drops down with a Leg Drop on Skippy’s head. Frak tries to escape out of the ring, but Cannabis grabs him. Cannabis lifts the Midget up over his head and slams him down to the mat with a Gorilla Press Slam.

AIELLO: Kid Cannabis has become quite the jerk since joining The Sedition.

JANNETTY: Yeah tell me about it. Yesterday he told me that mullets went out in the early 90’s. Can you believe the nerve of him?

AIELLO: Uhhh… yeah… what a scumbag.

Cannabis climbs outside the ring. He grabs a table from under the ring. Cannabis slides the table into the ring. He then stops to pose and hit on a scantily clad woman in the front row. As he is distracted Kiljoy gets up on his feet. He looks down at Frak uncurious on the mat. He looks over at Skippy, assuming he was the one who attacked Frak. Kiljoy grabs Skippy by the shirt. Skippy screams for Cannabis. Cannabis looks in at the ring. He rolls his eyes and slides back into the ring. Cannabis kicks Kiljoy in the back. Kiljoy let’s go of Skippy and Cannabis grabs him by the head. Cannabis executes THE CHRONIC. Skippy motions for Cannabis to go for the cover, but Cannabis shakes it off. Cannabis picks Kiljoy up, but Kiljoy hits him with a knee to the gut. Kiljoy grabs Cannabis up and slams him down to the mat with COTTON CANDY. Kiljoy goes for the cover. Skippy makes a very, very, slow count,

1...

…

…

…

2...

…

…

…

Cannabis kicks out.

AIELLO: This is getting ridiculous. Why can’t they just give Kiljoy a chance?

JANNETTY: I… ummm… I forgot what I was going to say.

AIELLO: Why can’t I ever work with professionals?

JANNETTY: Oh man, I blew my big chance. They’re gonna make me ride in the truck with the monkeys now.

Kiljoy gets up on his feet. He grabs Skippy with a look of rage in his eyes and Powerbombs him down to the mat. Kiljoy mounst himself on top of Skippy and starts to strangle him. Cannabis slowly gets up on his feet. He runs at Kiljoy and hits him with a Dropkick to the back of the head. Cannabis picks Kiljoy up and once again executes THE CHRONIC. This time he puts Kiljoy through the table. Cannabis drags Skippy to the center of the ring. Cannabis covers Kiljoy, and Skippy groggily makes the count,

1...

2...

3.

VIRGIL: Here is your winner, KID CANNABIS!!!

AIELLO: There you have it fans. Kid Cannabis picks up the win.

JANNETTY: Sure did.

AIELLO: You just said that because you couldn’t think of anything else to say didn’t you?

JANNETTY: Rock on baby!

Inside the ring Skippy raises Cannabis’ hand in the air as "War Is Necessary" by Nas plays. Cannabis starts to stomp don on Kiljoy. Skippy walks over and both men beat on Kiljoy. As they attack the lights in the arena go off.

JANNETTY: Hey, who turned out the lights?

AIELLO: Knowing Rev and Gladiator, it’s probably just defective lights they got on a bargain buy.

When the lights come back on both Cannabis and Skippy have been knocked unconscious. They are lying next to Kiljoy and Frak.

AIELLO: Wait a second. This seems more like a sneak attack then defective lights.

JANNETTY: That’s what I was going to say.

AIELLO: The only question here is, who attacked Cannabis and Skippy?

JANNETTY: I was going to say that too. Say would you mind putting in a good word for me with the bosses. You know, tell them I’m a good broadcasting guy.

AIELLO: Not a chance.

JANNETTY: Darn it!

AIELLO: That’s all the time we have tonight fans. I’m going home now that the snipers will leave me alone. We’ll see you next week.

Copyright: 2010 Sedition Production

_________________________

DC Antonio vs Waylon Hawthorne written by Taylor M
Teen Throb & Ian De Tornado vs Captain Insanity & Bryce Bridges written by Michael Saint
Mr. Kiljoy vs Kid Cannabis written by Gladiator