SNF: Spokane (4/17/10)

**The fans are on their feet chanting “SWA! SWA! SWA! SWA!” As the SWA logo flashes on the JumboTron, and pyrotechnics shoot off above the ring, many aggressive and slightly drunken fans push each other around to get their faces on camera. Joe Aillo sits shackled to his chair with Skippy Mohophosite at his left.**

JOE: What an announcement. We are now only 2 weeks away from Spring Breakdown. Skippy, with this tournament being open to just about anyone, who has the odds in their favor?

SKIPPY: Probably Gabreal Martin and Kid Cannabis.

JOE: Are you programmed to automatically respond with Sedition propaganda each time you're asked a question?

SKIPPY: I just recognize talent when I see it. Gabreal Marlowe and Kid Canvas have impressed me.

JOE: Which is why you just got their names wrong.

**Skippy pauses to think.**

SKIPPY: Getting names wrong is how we roll in The Sedition.

JOE: Whatever. Despite the fact that I'm forced to sit here against my will, and bound to this spot with shackles attached to my ankles, I'm actually a little excited about the show tonight. Take a look at what's scheduled.




JOE: To make this night even better, during the main event, you won't be next to me.

SKIPPY: That's right. I'll be special guest referee.

JOE: Normally I would assume you being in a main event with Kid Cannabis would be a setup for a one sided fight. I'm actually wondering if Rev and Gladiator booked it this way because they know you'll eventually be tortured by Kiljoy and Frak.

SKIPPY: I promised them I'd be a man and cast my fear away for the sake of a good main event.

JOE: Alright then. Sure hope you're wearing some Depends. Kiljoy and Frak have it out for you. In a little while we'll also see a tag team match with 2 SWA veterans, Teen Throb and Captain Insanity, each teaming up with 2 SWA rising stars, Ian De Tornado and Bryce Bridges. It will be interesting to see if those teams can work together.

SKIPPY: First up in DC Antonio's debut against “Geriatric” Waylon Hawthorne. Youth vs Experience.

JOE: Or sanity vs Alzheimers. Lets get down to the ring for the opening bout.







'New York' by Jay-Z blasts from the speakers above as DC Antonio emerges from backstage. The crowd boos as he makes his way down to the ring. DC is wearing some black boxing trunks, and black and red wrestling boots. He shows off his muscles, cracks his knuckles, and slides into the ring. Antonio jumps into a nearby turnbuckle and looks out to the crowd, raising both arms in the air, as the boos continue non-stop.

VIRGIL: Ladies and gentlemen, introducing for the first time to SWA audiences. He is originally from Genoa, Italy but now residing in The Big Apple! Standing 6 feet and 3 inches and weighing 242 pounds. He is pure blooded Italian, which means if he can't wrestle, I bet he can cook. Ladies and gentlemen, this is DC Antonio!

“The Last Saskatchewan Pirate” begins to play. Waylon walks out onto the stage and flexes his saggy old man muscles. Waylon walks down the aisle. About halfway to the ring he seems to forget what he’s doing. He looks around and sees the ring and suddenly remembers what he’s supposed to do. He climbs up onto the apron and steps through the ropes. He stands in the middle of the ring and does a dopey old man dance.

VIRGIL: And his opponent. From the oddly named Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan.... Seriously, is that a real city? Weird. He stands 5 feet and 10 inches tall and weighs in at 245 pounds. He's the dude that makes saggy man boobs cool. "Geriatric" Waylon Hawthorne!

The bell rings and the match is underway. Hawthorne and Antonio meet in the middle of the ring and lock up, but Antonio easily shoves Hawthorne to the ground. The crowd boos DC as he talks trash to the fallen Hawthorne. Hawthorne gets to his feet and tells him to bring it. Antonio shrugs his shoulders and moves forward. They lock up, and again Antonio shoves Hawthorne hard to the canvas.

Hawthorne climbs back to his feet, clearly frustrated. In a display of total disrespect, Antonio puts his hands behind his back and offers his chin to Hawthorne.

JOE: Someone's cocky.

Hawthorne is not sure if this is a trap or not. Antonio assures him that it isn’t - he’s willing to give him a free shot. Hawthorne does not look amused, but he rears his fist back, steps forward - and kicks Antonio Antonio right between the legs. Antonio drops to his knees, clutching his bruised groin. Hawthorne bounces off the ropes and dropkicks him right in the face.

SKIPPY: Ohhhhhhh. I can't bear to watch.

Hawthorne slaps Antonio in the face and returns the trash talk before stomping on his head and chest. Antonio rolls towards the rope, and the referee forces Hawthorne off of him. Antonio gets back to his feet, still sore but with a look of anger and humiliation on his face. He charges at Hawthorne, but he ducks, bounces off the ropes and comes back with a flying forearm smash that puts Antonio back down. Antonio climbs to his feet, but Hawthorne takes him down with another smash. Antonio gets back up, a little slower this time, and Hawthorne rushes him, but Antonio ducks, picks Hawthorne up and drives his to the mat with a Samoan drop. He makes a cover.

..1


...2


Hawthorne kicks out.

Antonio picks Hawthorne up and whips him into the ropes, catching him with a hip toss on the return. Hawthorne lies in obvious pain, clutching his back. Antonio picks him up delivers a back breaker.

Antonio picks Hawthorne up again and whips him into the far corner, Hawthorne hits the turnbuckles with force and drops to the canvas. Antonio taunts the crowd before walking over to Hawthorne in the corner. He pulls Hawthorne up by his hair while insulting the elderly man. Hawthorne replies with a kick to the gut followed up by an inside cradle for a cover.

..1


...2


Antonio kicks out.

JOE: That one was close.

SKIPPY: I think Hawthorne pulled his Sciatica on that one.

JOE: Do you even know what a Sciatica is?

SKIPPY: Not sure. Sounds like some kind of Barbarian tribe. "I am the Sciatican, son of Conan".

Both wrestlers get to their feet, but Hawthorne manages to land the first blow with a dropkick to the knee, then a roundhouse kick straight to Antonio’s head. Hawthorne grabs Antonio’s leg and lays it out straight before stomping right on the ankle. Antonio groans in pain and grabs his leg. Hawthorne kicks him in the head, grabs the leg again, and this time lands both feet on the ankle with a double foot stomp.

Hawthorne grabs the leg again, but Antonio pushes him away and he lands in the middle of the ring, hitting his back against the canvas. Hawthorne rubs his back as he gets to his feet, but Antonio is up too, and he drops Hawthorne with a clothesline. Antonio is limping slightly as he tries to walk off the pain in his ankle, not realising that Hawthorne is back up. Hawthorne runs forward, but Antonio sees him coming and picks him up, dropping his throat first across the top rope. Hawthorne goes down clutching his neck.

JOE: He's gonna kill the old man out there.

SKIPPY: Pfft. When has anyone ever died from losing the ability to breathe. Don't be so overly dramatic, Joe.

Antonio throws Hawthorne into the corner. Antonio backs up and charges forward for a big splash, but Hawthorne gets his feet up and nails him right between the eyes. Antonio turns around, dazed and confused, allowing Hawthorne the chance to climb onto the second turnbuckle. Hawthorne takes down Antonio with a bulldog. Hawthorne feels the impact in his back and can’t capitalise. Both men lay motionless on the mat.

The Ref starts to count.

..1


...2


....3


.....4


......5


With the help of the ring ropes, Hawthorne starts to pull himself back to his feet,but Antonio is up first. Antonio stomps on Hawthorne’s back. Antonio pulls him to his feet and nails a hard suplex. He attacks Hawthorne with stomps to the face and body. Antonio drags Hawthorne to the middle of the ring and locks on a Camel Clutch.

JOE: This is some openiong match. These guys are fighting like the Title's on the line already.

Hawthorne screams in agony. The referee asks his if he gives up, but every time he yells, “No.” Hawthorne is in the middle of the ring with no way to get to the ropes. Antonio wrenches back on the hold, and Hawthorne is fading. The referee picks up his hand. It drops. He picks it up once more, and it drops a second time. Once more he lifts up Hawthorne’s hand… and it stays up. Hawthorne slams his fist against the canvas, but Antonio keeps a firm grip on the hold. Hawthorne does the only thing he can in this situation; managing to slip his chin down, he bites hard on Antonio‘s hand.

Antonio screams in pain as Hawthorne bites down even more. He releases his grip of the hold. Hawthorne knocks him back with a shot to the face. Antonio gets back to his feet, but Hawthorne is still down in the ring. Antonio moves forward, and Hawthorne manages to kick him in the knee, leaving him to fall flat on his face. Grabbing his leg, Antonio stumbles back up and tries to rush the prone Hawthorne, but he answers with another kick, this time a swinging blow to the back of the knee that drops Antonio backwards. Raising his leg high in the air, Hawthorne brings his boot back down, landing heel first on the knee of Antonio.

SKIPPY: He's really working on that leg.

JOE: That knee won't be able to take much more abuse.

Hawthorne drags himself up to a standing position and lands three stiff kicks to the knee of Antonio before he locks in a figure four leglock. Antonio cries out in pain as Hawthorne tries to stretch his legs out straight. Antonio begins to drag himself across the ring to the ropes. Antonio’s leg is being bent out of shape as Hawthorne attempts to apply as much pressure to his ankle as possible.

The ref checks Antonio as he looks like he might quit. Antonio shakes his head in response to the referee. Antonio struggles and fights the hold. Antontio rips the pocket off the referee's shirt, causing the ref to look down in confusion. The distraction gives Antonio enough time to reach forward and poke Hawthorne in the eyes, which causes him to break the hold.

SKIPPY: Atta boy. When in doubt, poke out the eyes.

JOE: This is SWA. This place was built on cheap shots.

Both wrestlers slowly get back to their feet, Hawthorne still holding his back as Antonio limps around the ring. They meet in the middle of the ring, Antonio swinging wildly. Hawthorne ducks and answers with chops to Antonio’s chest. Antonio replies with a rake of the eyes and a back drop into a cover.

..1


...2


Hawthorne barely kicks out.

Antonio stands up and pulls Hawthorne to his feet. He lifts his up into position for the New York Necksnap, but his knee gives out from under him. Hawthorne lands on his feet and nails Antonio with a DDT and he goes for the cover.

..1


...2


Antonio barely kicks out.

JOE: I can't believe these guys are still kicking out. Where are they getting their energy from?

Both men lie on the mat, catching their breaths. Hawthorne is the first to get to his feet. He gentle stretches his back, holding it in pain. Hawthorne stomps at Antonio as he gets back to his feet. Both men lock up and Hawthorne executes a jawbreaker. Antontio staggers back a little. Hawthorne spears him into the turnbuckle where he proceeds to stomp Antonio down to the mat. Hawthorne pulls Antonio back up, leaning him against the turnbuckle. Hawthorne lays a series of chops across Antonio's chest. Antonio pushes Hawthorne back and sits himself up on the top turnbuckle. Hawthorne quickly grabs his opponent and excutes a top rope bodyslam. Hawthorne is back on his feet. Hawthorne bounces off the ropes and drops a Hogan style Atomic Leg drop across the chest of Antonio.

Hawthorne goes for the cover.

..1





...2





....3




Winner: Waylon Hawthorne

JOE: Unbelievable opening match. If either of these guys fight like that in the Spring Breakdown tournament, they'll have a fair shot at the belt.

SKIPPY: What if they fight each other again in the first round?

JOE: Uh..... then I guess one of them will have a fair shot at the belt.

SKIPPY: What if one of them fights a bear in the semi finals?

JOE: A bear? Have you ever seen a bear in an SWA match?

SKIPPY: Yes.

**Joe stops and thinks for a second.

JOE: Oh yeah. Lions and Tigers too.

SKIPPY: See. Not everything I say is stupid.

JOE: Correction. Not everything you say is a lie.

SKIPPY: Fine. If you'll excuse me for a second, there's a redhead in row 3 that keeps giving me "the look".

JOE: It's probably a lazy eye. We'll be back after this.